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Monday, March 26, 2007

ANNOUNCEMENT FOR MAYOR PRO TEM ZUMA DOGG: City of Los Angeles Is OPEN For Convention & Tourism Business Despite President's Garcetti's Bad PR Memo


Since Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa feels the best place to manage the City, is from everywhere else OUTSIDE the City (he's out of town, a-gain), Zuma Dogg has declared an emergency ordinance proclaiming him Mayor Pro Tem (replacing Council President, the Honorable Eric Garcetti), since the current Mayor Pro Tem's Rhodes Scholar education, seems to have failed him in the area of "thinking before you speak." (Don't they teach that in the Ivy Leauges?)

SO CURRENT MAYOR PRO TEM, AND THE NEXT MAYOR OF LOS ANELES, ZUMA DOGG IS HERE TO ANNOUNCE TO THE BUSINESS AND TOURISM COMMUNITY, ON BEHALF OF "ABSENTEE ANTIONIO":

Although the City of Los Angeles continues to operate in violation of international protocol and standards by ignoring methods for management of quality and productivity; and although the City of Los Angeles continues to operate in violation of their own Charter Law regarding condo-conversions, which continues to destory the socio-economic integrity of the community (middle class is getting reamed, and pushed out of town); gridlock traffic conditions this policy has caused; overcrowded classrooms failing to producer high-quality job candidates; and overall BAD planning, because when construction campaign contributions are the ONLY factors you consider in the plan, the City becomes an un-liveable, un-operable mess, that ends up having to raise and raise and raise taxes to support all your Eli Broad, Richard Riordan, Villaraigosa screw-ups --

THE CITY IS STILL OPEN FOR YOUR CONVENTION AND TOURISM BUSINESS! So, if you have a major convention, and want to host in this part of the continent -- MAY MAYOR PRO TEM ZUMA DOGG SUGGESTS HOLDING IT HERE, RIGHT HERE, in the international jewel of a City, Los Angeles, California (of the Southern NAFTA region). We have hotels, staffed with happy employees, eager to server, just minutes from the airport. So you don't even have to leave the area, and drive through gridlock traffic, only to be greeted by agressive downtown skid-row panhandlers -- because although they built all that stuff Downtown, they forgot to address the homeless issue first, so now they are more intermingled, than multiple items on a single Council ballot measure.

And tourists...be sure and stop by Venice Beach. It's close to the airport, and you can buy all the handmade jewelry, incense, sage, Zuma Dogg shirts, Shea Butter and ANYTHING YOU WANT...

It's all for sale on the BEACH SIDE of the boardwalk. AND IT'S and really, really cheap. Because the vendors on the beach side don't have to pay rent, or taxes, so they can sell you a concert shirt for $5.00, or a pack of incense for a dollar...AND THE POLICE WILL NOT ENFORCE THE ORIDINACE BANNING SUCH SALES, because Chief Bratton doesn't want to cost the taxpayers millions and millions in lawsuits -- just cause Bill Rosendoh, Shadyragossa, and Garshmetti have some contributions to accept and $1.5 million condos to build.

SO TRY AND IGNORE THE LOS ANGELES CITY COUNCILS' PRESIDENT COMMENTS -- THE WAY HE IGNORES EVERYONE ELSES" COMMENTS THAT AREN'T CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTION RELATED.

Unlike Mayor Pro Tem Garcetti, Mayor Pro Temp Zuma Dogg will not drive your convention business to Las Vegas, because all you want is hotel and convention space CLOSE to the airport, so as to keep travel and expenses down. HE WILL LET YOU SAY WHATEVER YOU WANT (AS PROTECTED UNDER THE FIRST AMENDMENT), WON'T IMPOSE FALSE LOCAL ORDINANCES OVER STATE AND FEDERAL LAW, WILL NOT TURN IN INAPPROPRIATE EXPENSE REPORTS WITH QUESTIONABLE PEOPLE, AND WILL NOT DESTROY THE CITY WITH RAMPANT CONDO-CONVERSIONS IN VIOLATION OF CITY CHARTER -- AND I WON'T DRIVE THE MIDDLE CLASS OUT TO INLAND EMPIRE, JUST BECAUSE THERE IS A CAMPAIGN CONTRIBUTION TO BE COLLECTED IN THE TRANSACTION.

But most of all, by staying near the airport and out of Downtown LA, you just may avoid something much more damaging to the reputation of the City than even Skid Row -- it's called "Jan Perry." And a day without Jan and her misguided agenda, is "TRULY a GREAT DAY for your convention and tourism business in the City of Los Aneles!"

* And thanks to Mayor Antonio Viagraosa and Los Angeles Shady Council for rubbing Aladdin's Lamp, and unleashing the Zuma Dogg who was quietly bottled up inside, and selling Tshirts and not bothering anyone at Venice Beach. But those insecure, greedy, gentrifying, lying, fraud, waste and abusing sunsabitches couldn't let a sleeping dogg sleep.

YOURS IN ABLAZEMENT, NOT ABATEMENT,

Zuma Dogg,
Reality Show Producer Magnet
(Get ready for bigger cameras!)

In the meantime, I can think of no finer day to hit the button, y;all...

[I'll send you a 2 hour ZD DVD, CD of original songs/radio calls, plus signed ZD custom greeting card with every $19.00 donation on 3/26-3/27/07. Plus, you'll be helping support the hungry and stuck with no gas activist.]

14 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said:

This must have been a particularly potent order of Kush Oil, ZD...

It's clear you've been smoking some brain-damaging shit.

March 26, 2007 2:04 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Hey ZD, what is this that Cap'n Jack is talking about on another thread? Huizar running a business out of City Hall and being an executive of a finance company?

March 26, 2007 2:06 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

2:04pm..."kush oil"? MAN -- are you living right. It will be a triumphant day, indeed, when ZD can walk into his co-op and afford some oil, y'all!
So for now, all the brain damage has to be attributed to plain old sour diesel.

2:06pm...no, not that.

AND SPEAKING OF CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW, how does this tickle your fancy, mate. (ZD don't use the word, "savvy", mate...it's too linguistically fancy sounding) At least British rock bands call each other "mate", so I'll stick to that, savvy, I mean "mate."

Hopefully, by now, no one else is reading, cause this message is only for Captain Jack to read please for his comment:

Zuma Dogg's specualtion is that all tracks leading back to Supreme Courts San Fran decision over a $40 million dollar lawsuit over SCHOOL construction project, that now sets legal precident -- leads Zuma Dogg to believe they (California Supreme Court) were infiltrated/paid off/gotten to by people like Harvey Construction -- whose VP has publicly stated he too much regulation is slowing down the steamrollers and cement trucks and wants to overturn to false claims act. And the timing of Supreme Court's San Fran ruling raised ZD's eyebrow:

IT HAPPENED JUST BEFORE THE INFRASTRUCTURE BOND MONEY WAS BEING PUT TO A VOTE. HOW COME NOT ONE NEWSPAPER REPORTED THE FACT THAT THE SUPREME COURT JUST SET LEGAL PRECIDENT THAT REMOVES ANY AND ALL FISCAL RESPOSIBILTY AS PREVIOUSLY PROTECTED UNDER THE FALSE CLAIMS ACT? Voters may have voted AGAINST the bond, had they known any and all shady fraud waste and abuse is no longer protected, as it previously was under F.C.A.

The ruling can be seen as a precident that would prevent ANY public agency to sue a vendor for fraud, waste and abuse -- under whatever jurisdiction previously covered by the F.C.A.

Additionally, a citizen may no longer be able to sue the City for THEIR fraud, waste and abuse of public money, of ANY public department (DWP, LAUSD, LAPD, City Hall, MTA, etc.)

And now we are building a bunch of skyscrapers and new schools and the mayor is trying to get his hands on the budget, and a certain fromer Mayoral candidate was laughing publicly, at a public meeting how he profited off of LAUSD construction projects??? And why does someone feel the ethics committee website will show some intrersted people show up, for some intersting reasons, as relating to the False Claims Act. Inspector General minds want to know. But this is all just speculation on my part.

Yours in Investigation,

Zuma Dogg
Cast member, "Zuma Dogg Runs For Mayor" reality show, coming soon, but not soon enough.

March 26, 2007 2:17 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

ZD BUSTS PAYPAL SCAM EMAIL PHISING RING TODAY. Now,others will not be bamboozled, because ZD will not be bamboozled. Hooooody hoooooooo!

March 26, 2007 3:34 PM  

Anonymous Captain Jack Sparrow said:

Good afternoon Mr. Dogg (tips hat):

It would help, lad, if you would tell us which of the Harvey boys you are speaking of? Is it the Harvey who does construction in New Hampshire...old what's-his-name? Or perhaps you're talking about BJ Harvey up in Atascadero with some bloke named Kavanaugh as his agent for procress, savvy?

If you are referring to the Harvey Construction in Montclair, then you must mean the one with the suspended corporate charter, no? Or how about brother Fred whose Santa Monica based construction firm was dissolved by the Secretary of State? No, I think you were referring to cousin J.J. Harvey whose corporation was located not too far from the helmsman in Pacific Palisades? J.J.'s corporation was also suspended by the Secretary of State.

The only Harveys I know are the winsome lassies known as Harvey Girls who could serve up a hot dish or two, savvy?

March 26, 2007 3:52 PM  

Anonymous Matt Dowd said:

BREAKING NEWS : Big time civil rights attorney just called me. we dropped off our [Venice 42.15]legal papers to him today, and he called us straight back. Says he likes the look of our situation . Guy called Steve Rhode y'all. Now the City gonna have to pay an attorney too. What a nice surprise when they get back from 'lobbying'.

March 26, 2007 3:54 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

Cpt. Jack...thanks for the rundown of "harveys". sounds like a shady bunch, that probably gets along real well with some other folks in town. i'll check some expense reports, and whatnot.

Meanwhile, i think i like the harvey girls, better, y'all.

March 26, 2007 4:11 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

That's actually a good deal with the DVDs and CDs. Now you're onto something Zuma. Can I wait to payday though?

March 26, 2007 11:21 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You need a vacation, buddy.

Your health is deteriorating and your clothes stink, and your ideas get crazier and crazier.

You have ruined this blog and made it not worth reading.

Mayor Sam, can't you take back your space from this fool?

March 27, 2007 3:23 AM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

You're posting about ZD at 3:23am? Hmmmm? But yeah, I DO need a vacation, my health is deteriorating and my clothes DO stink. But, you still haven't told me why my ideas are crazy, or what I have gotten wrong, here. I would like to be corrected. I don't mind walking around in stinky clothes, burnt out, in deteriorating health -- but I would never want to be walking around posting incorrect information. And you STILL have not commented on anything except me (as opposed to the issue.) And you are a two faced, pussy who pretends to be my friend in person, invites me to sit next to you, and you are such a pathetic dweeb, you would NEVER have the courage to say any of this to my face. But show up at City Hall anytime, or tell me where to meet you, and I'll be glas to say it to your face. No go get the psychological counseling your wife and kids need you to get. You're posting about Zuma Dogg at 3 in the morning, and that's GOTTA be a warning sign?

March 27, 2007 2:12 PM  

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