Whistleblower hotline: (213) 785-6098

Friday, March 23, 2007

Zuma Dogg's Weekend Tid Bits

* Thanks to the Planning Department Insider who saw ZD in the coffee shop on the second floor, who seems to think there are way TOO MANY TRACT MAPS being blown through the agenda, like ZD has been complaining about for months, IN VIOLATION OF VACANCY RATES. THE INSIDER ADMITTED TO ZD, THEY SIMPLY IGNORE THIS CHARTER MANDATE. However, good news of encouragment was passed along by ZD's "fly on the planning department wall": Apparantley, Noel Weiss, Zuma Dogg and Chuck Tennnen made some much noise, "on-the-record" in committee and council meetings, the pack of previously blind Councilmembers magically got their sight back, and squashed a condo-conversion DUE TO VACANCY RATES, Y'ALL...yeah, yeah! So come on down to City Hall, put these shady, contribution-funneling, fraud, waste and abusers "on-the-record", y'all...and they'll be forced to obey the Charter, y'all...And that makes for "a TRULY...GREAT DAY, for the constituents of Los Aneles."

* MAYOR ANTONIO'S AIRBUS PHOTO OP COSTS TAXPAYERS $24,280!: That giant, high-density airbus, originally only scheduled to land in New York and Chicago, made a special apperance at LAX, too -- cause Mayor Antonio didn't want to miss a photo opportunity with anything "high-density" related. So if the biggest airplane ever, is on a promotional tour of the U.S., Mayor Antonio wants HIS picture taken with it, too, y'all. Mayor Tony, now that we are pals, can I have a copy of the $24,280 picture please, and I'll post it on Mayor Sam's blog, for you. Meanwhile, Matt Dowd's video of the shakey landing that scared Zuma Dogg off ever setting foot on that flying-disaster-waiting-to-happen is up to 53,000, yes, 53,000 views on YouTube in 48 hours. If you ever thought of travelling on this flying skyscraper, watch this video, first. www.youtube.com/deepsouth81.

* Thanks to one of ZD's numerous posse of City Hall staffers who like to tell ZD things they shouldn't, for confirming what I posted on Friday, that the reason Mayor Antonyo VETOED the "floor transfer rights" and the "rooftop sky rights' ordincances, is because Council did indeed forget to cut the political superstar in for his piece of the pie, y'all...NEXT TIME, DON'T GET IT TWISTED -- ANTONIO VILLARAIGOSA RUNS THIS 15 DISTRICT BLOCK. YOU GOTTA CUT HIM IN, IF YOU'RE DOING BIZNESS ON HIS TURF, Y'ALL. (See Iceberg Slim/Magic Don Juan.)

* Speaking of Weiss...(ass), looks like he's taking the advice of City PR/Marketing master, Zuma Dogg -- and trying to (Hulka Voice), "Lighten up, Francis." The perpetually grimacing, constituent opponent now sees he better rub a little warm and fuzzy over his image, so today at City Hall, in walked the group of school kids, who Jack uncomfortably had to pull oout his condesending "Mr. Rogers" voice to greet the kids on camera. And ZD can tell City TV 35 is no fan of Jackass, either (the politician, not Knoxville) -- because as Mr. Friendly was greeting the kids on camera, the switcher engineer kept the shot on the kids, and Jack got ZERO face time, for the effort. I would have posted it on YouTube, but now, thanks to TV 35, the event may as well not have even existed. (Why greet school kids, if it doesn't go out on camera...this isn't radio. That's not Jack's medium, either, thanks to Doug Mcintyre.)

* March 25: One year anniversary of the Mayor and Council's ban of Zuma Dogg shirts and Matt Dowd's incense on Venice Beach. And one year after Pandora's Box of Zuma Dogg has been opened, LAPD now knows that what ZD/Dowd were saying is true...the ordinance was unconstitutional in the first place, and the cops will no longer enforce "King of the Do-Nothings" Bill Rosenhoh's bogus-ban. One year of Zuma Dogg at City Hall? Dr. Phil wants to know, "How's that workin' for ya?"

* Thanks to Captain Jack for letting ZD know that the Supreme Court ruling AGAINST the "False Claims Act", in San Fran School case is somehow tied to Councils' expense reports. YIKES! Did ZD stumble onto something with this one, or what?


Anonymous Anonymous said:

Oh, ZD, you are so wonderful! What ever would Los Angeles do without you?

You are the answer to our prayers; someone to tell us how to live, how to govern and how to make things work.

I cannot imagine Los Angeles without your advice (Deming, of course).

Please tell us again how great you are and how much everyone needs and admires you.

March 23, 2007 9:42 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

Defeated Loser posted these same four words, about a thousand times in a row. So I did an edit to maintain the spirit, but so as not to disrupt the
blogging experience for functional adults.

Anonymous said...
here let me help...


March 23, 2007 10:40 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Zuma, you ignorant fool. How many "defeated losers" hate you?

If they are so defeated, how come you're the one sleeping in your van tonight?

March 23, 2007 11:12 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

I think there is ONE defeated loser. And regarding sleeping in my van...I sleep there, triumphantly --- reflecting on how through all the miserable conditions as a result of Council's unconstitutional ordinance that denied me my living, and tanked my living conditions -- I've just had the most gratifying, enriching experience of my life (and I thought those days were behind me.) But that's a feeling that comes from sense of community. And you can live in the Taj Mahal and be the lonliest, empty person. Which must be your case, since you asked the question. But there are some wonderful authors and speakers who can help provide you the comfort you need to fill the huge hole that is causing you to waste your life and bringing out your most destructive emotions. Are you a parent? I hope not. They must feel completley abandoned, or ignored -- and that's a formula for disaster. Dr. Laura has some advice, "Forget about Zuma Dogg, and go take on the day!"

March 23, 2007 11:35 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Whom have you defeated ZD? I was unaware you were in a fight with anyone other than yorself.

March 23, 2007 11:48 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

he sleeps in his van triumphantly. HA HA HA HA

Been off your meds long?

March 24, 2007 1:05 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Defeated Loser = Anyone who disagrees or criticizes Dave Elliott.

Hey, Antonio, Garcetti, LeBonge, Chick, Delgadillo, and many others have been defeated by ZD in combat.

And, he does it all in three minutes, or less!!!!

The secret? He applies the 14 points from the only book he ever read in Jr. High School.

Hell, University and higher education is for suckers. He's out saving the world, in between beggin for gas, coffee and food money.

Maybe he needs to spend some of it on soap and a razor.

March 24, 2007 4:47 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You tell 'em Zuma, after all, you have nothing else to do until Monday. No three minute cameo's on the weekends, huh?

Must be lonely in the van with all of your fans!!!

Buddy, you are a caricature of yourself. Take a look in the mirror and ask yourself if you'd take any advice from a life loser like you.

Do you really think anyone takes you seriously? You are the laughingstock of City Hall, the perpetual inside joke.

Why not clean up and get a job with Cerrell or someone, and maybe some government official will actually listen to you instead of having their eyes glaze over...

March 24, 2007 5:08 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

A couple of years ago weiss held a kneejerk press conference with then CM Antonio speaking out against Ch 35 over a couple programs that it aired one week which snowballed into discussions of 35's takeover by a non profit channel. Can't remember what the programs in question were. I think some cooking show. Those intially against 35 was weiss, parks, gruel and zine. Antonio didn't really say much against 35 at the press conference but it seems 35 hasn't forgiven weiss since.

March 24, 2007 6:49 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

ZD can you tell us, Who is "defeated loser"?

March 24, 2007 6:59 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Walter you can't post on the first thread.

WHERE'S WALDO THIS WEEKEND? At a press conf. denouncing the gang violence of LAUSD students? NO, He's once again supporting the illegals. I'm glad its in Inglewood, let them deal with these uneducated idiots. Yes, I'm Latino and want them all bused back to Mexico. THhy're ruining our city.

....About 10,000 people are expected Sunday at the Los Angeles Forum from 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. for a teach-in about immigration reform and civic participation. The event will feature Latino entertainers, faith leaders, community activists and elected officials, including L.A. MAYOR ANTONIO VILARAIGOSA and video addresses by Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton and House Speaker Nancy Pelosi.

In addition, many local activists want to turn up the "street heat" with mass mobilizations, but some national organizations fear alienating the public and embarrassing the new Democratic majority in Congress, according to Nativo Lopez of the Mexican American Political Assn. in Los Angeles.


March 24, 2007 7:22 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Zuma fights the ghosts in his own mind. He then lashes out at anyone and everyone around him if he believes for one second that he isn't the center of the universe.

Why do we even bother with this stupid blog anymore?

March 24, 2007 7:35 AM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

Wow! Looks like some people were having some trouble sleeping last night.

When I say "defeated loser" I am referring to the PERSON who is posting all this stuff about me, not the politicians, or anyone else. Defeated Crybaby Loser refers to the person we all know is posting this stuff.

You know what is really sad. Look how much time and energy you are wasting, with the sole purpose of trying to hurt my feelings and make me feel bad.

I may be gruff and whatever...but I've never been out to hurt someone's feelings, or diminish them, for anything else other than their policy as elected officials.

It's not like I sit and criticize them PERSONALLY, or make fun of them for personal reasons,or their shortcomings.

What a mean spirit you are to try and make me feel bad. That's why your proflie in this town has never made it off the ground, and you cannot motivate or lead, so you storm out of the room and quit.

Sorry pal, today is another day, and that means it's another "Zuma Dogg Celebration Day" on the streets of Los Angeles.

And I'm about to be greeted with smiles and warm stories throughout the day-- and people are going to tell me how much they love "Zuma Dogg" and how much (he, cause it's a character) means to them -- JUST ASK ANYONE WHO HAS SPENT FIVE MINUTES WITH ME IN PUBLIC.

I got a letter from a nurse who works with AIDS paitients all day, and she sent me a letter from Washington, saying she moved out of LA and missed my show, becasue it's the ONLY thing that takes her mind off her job and sent me a check to send here some videos. (I'll show you the letter.)

Emmy, Grammy, Academy award winners have all paid their respects to ZD...

Parents AND kids, saying it's the only show they all watch together.

Loser, people get on their cell phones and call their friends and tell them to "hurry over to (location), Zuma Dogg is here." Or all the cell phones people stick in my face to say, "hello" to their friend, BECAUSE THEY WOULD NEVER BELEIVE THEY ACTUALLY MET ZD.

Recently, I was on the phone talking to KABC...it was at night, so the street was empty. But ONE person comes walking down the street and as they pass they say, "Hi Zuma Dogg."

So I say, "How did you know it's me?" He said, "I recognize your voice. I listen every night, to hear you. As a matter of fact, I'm taping the show , right now, so I don't miss your call. (And he sent me the MP3 of the call he actually WAS taping.

BRO, do you know how HUGE that is? One random person in the entire City comes walking down the street, and they recognize my voice and were taping the show, so as not to miss my call.

HOWEVER -- I'm telling you, I've been kinda one of those bitter, loner comedians, all my life, so it's not like I'm really having the last laugh, or anything. My life is VERY unbalanced, and I need ZD to be the icebreaker for me, or I would spend my life talking to ZERO people a day.

So I DO need to go on TV and make everyone like me, because my biggest curse I suffer from is what I call "Aladdin's Lamp" syndrome.

As people know, I'm not afraid to talk, and appear outgoing...but in social situations, YOU have to engage the conversation. I live in an emotional cage, that prevents me from initiating dialouge.

So I have to work around it, like a handicap (emotional handicap)...so I created Zuma Dogg to be my crutch.

So I need the ZD reputation to precced me, so people break the ice for me, say "hey ZD, love your show..." and I can come out of the bottle. (I know it's pathetic. Don't you know what they say about comedians?)

Look how the public has rallied behind me, defeated loser. Look at every thing I have commented on regarding City Hall. I HOPE I DON'T GET SUED FOR PLAGARISM...Cause 100% of ZD content was provided to me, by the people YOU storm out of the room from.

AND tonight, I look forward to HOSTING the WHITESTARR concert at the legendary Malibu Inn, for VH1 -- and the local crowd will go nuts when ZD walks into the room, and I'll be surrounded by people who want to pay their respects to ZD, all night.

I can't tell you how many people walk up to me and say, "Are you Zuma Dogg?" Only to walk away thinking they DIDN'T meet me, "cause there's no way Zuma Dogg would be at La Salsa ordering his own food. (People think I'm this rich superstar.)

Know I know this is gonna make your brain explode -- but it's all true, will take a lie detector test to verify, and I can't really tell you the best stuff, cause that would come off excessively boastful. And I know the people who dig ZD, like hearing these stories.

So to them...yeah, it's rough being ZD...I am my own worst enemy...That's nothing new. It would be nice for me to pick and choose the qualities I wish I had -- and didn't have, but it's this bitterness and frustration that fuels the Dogg. A content Dogg, means no show kiddies.

Loser, see you wish you could be YOU, AND do what Zuma Dogg does. Just like I wish I had a balanced pickett fence life, with a family of my own, and traditional job. But you don't want to be ZD...it's a 24/7 job that has taken over my entire brain and life. So I roll with it, and my reward isn't financial...it's spiritual and emotional.

I mean think about it...what does it say about a guy who is able to think from such a misery-based, negative, bamboolzle mindset? THAT is the key to comedy, I have found. I can look at ANYTHING and find the bad angle. And when you're dealing with City Hall, that seems to be a valuable mindset in creating opposing arguments.


AND, I would like to say, Zuma Dogg IS caught up on a runaway train with all this City Hall., political stuff...EVERY DAY IS MY LAST DAY...but I can't walk away, cause the river never stops flowin.

And every day I wake up thinking TODAY is gonna be the day Adam Sandler follows up on all of his promises, or something like that. Meanwhile, I've realized, I DON'T need Steven Spielberg to give me that Greenlight to be the superstar of my own world.

-- and now I have to go...someone is hoovering over my table at Starbuck's with a HUGE grin on their face, waiting for me to wrap this post up, so they can say , "Hello".

That's just the way it is...when ZD steps out of his van, and ZD appreciation day begins. (A lot of it is based on my comedy show for six years, BEFORE city hall...and now of course TV 35 and even moreso, radio calls has taken it to a whole new level. But it's a blessing, and a curse -- it would be nice to have ONLY the blessing part, and not the curse, but the universe doesn't work that way.

So you go with what you have, and work around it.

Zuma Dogg used to want to be KISS, or Bruce Springsteen, Bono, or whoever...but now I don't have to be, I'm Zuma Dogg. Again, you don't want to be ZD because it's an extremely unbalance life...You have other things in your life that fill your void, so you are not compelled to do what I do, because it ain't fun or easy. But it is rewarding, not financially, but it is in every other way.

I think the people who appreciate ZD, and do not feel threatened by him, are the people who are already the stars of their own world, would never want the curse of being ZD, but sure do like that someone else is cursed out there, who cannot prevent himself from being an over-the-top, obsessively compusled Jackass. Man, do people like watching that.

March 24, 2007 8:11 AM  

Anonymous Matt Dowd said:

Zuma Dogg has commandeered public comment on Ch. 35, and I couldn't be happier. We warned you all from Day 1 not to mess with Venice again, after so many defeats over the last 20 years over this silly vending bullshit.
The fact that you hate him so much on here is always proof of his effectiveness at raising issues that you don't like raised.
pandora's box has been opened, and now you got to figure out how to live with that.....

March 24, 2007 9:03 AM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


First of all, 4:47am??? Bro, stop thinking about Zuma Dogg for a couple hours, maybe. But besides that, don't make more enemies for ZD than he makes on his own. When I have gone to comabat with LeBonge, Chick or Delgadillo.

I spoke with Tom theBong yesterday, in person, about a high-speed rail project, that could be very promising that he mentioned. And we found common ground on the issue, in the sense it may be more "do-able" that the other proposed high speed rail, that is so fantastic, it'll never get off the ground, or rail.) So Tom was kinda happy to hear ZD say that.

Delgadillo: Are you kidding? He LITERALLY wrote the "No on Prop. R" speech for ZD. (I know, I know...prop. r passed...aren't you guys so great with all your millions, versus the budget-free ZD, but that's not the point here.) Maybe I should have for other things, but where's the ZD vs Rocky match?

Chick? Where's the beef. (I hope you don't mean one post that was critical of her GARS plan? That was hardly "combat", as it was a single post offering "constructive" criticism. (Whether you agree with the criticism.)

Man, no wonder you are always filled with fear-based anger...you are SO angry, you filter information, and it becomes distorted, in your own mind -- things are added in the translation. Some things go unheard. It creates confusion, paranoia, ignorance and the resulting anger out of the frustration.

Anthony Robbins has some good audio tapes on this...AND I also like Richard Bandler who is the co-founder of NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming). The art and science of communication with others and your own subconcious mind.

It could probably provide you with not only some relief, but will allow you to become a MUCH more effective communicator and be able to create the kind of rapport that will propel you to top of mind awareness in the world's largest media market, for less money than you spend each day at Starbucks.

But you are probably in SUCH a bad state, you may have to go straight to the next Robbins seminar or have to listen to the CD, instead of being able to focus enough to read it. Try YouTube. i know they have some Robbins videos, but not the stuff relating to this. Or, you can give me a call and I'll explain it to you.

Cause if I can free you of your emotional prision you are locked inside of, maybe you are a really great person (because I think you have a lot of valuable knowlege, and you know I have contacted you by phone to ask you to share it with me...but you were too angry to want to help fuel ZD's fire in any way, shape or form -- so you withheld the information, that could have been used to HELP get out the important message you spend your whole life fighting for. So that's like enabeling the crime...failing to raise awarness, given the chance, over ego and anger.

So you can be the lone cheese who stands alone.
The rest of us, are having a blast -- or at least enjoying the sense of community provide each other colletively. ***, you are welcome to come back on board, and start being a part of it, but you gotta come clean...post under you own name, and become the community leader we need you to be.

None of us can cover the entire City...we need soldiers everywhere...we become more than the sum of our parts. There IS a network of activists out there, a community in the true sense of the word, and after a year, I see how EVERYONE knows EVERYONE else -- it's like the radio industry, where you see the same 200 people at every event. And we all share info and whatnot.

You are currently not a part of this system. So all you do is hurt yourself (anger, frustration....missing out on all the fun the rest of us are having) - plus, you deny the system of your valuable knowlege and experience in the area you represent (geographically and topically).

You could just have decided to drop all of this, right now, and free-up your spirit, to do the good work you are capable of.

Look at all it's costing you...the time you are not spending with your kids...the time it is taking away from other positive things you could be doing. Unless you are getting paid to post about ZD 24/7, you are doing nothing but wasting your OWN time. Have you walked away from something important to you, because of ZD? But ZD is still living his day, doing his thing. Was on TV, radio, newspaper and blogs all YESTERDAY.

So the only person you have stopped, in all of this, is yourself. Just because you hate ZD, I hope you can take the decade it took me to learn this, and save years and years of bitter, lonley frustration and anger. You might end up walking around in a ski cap and sunglasses -- with less than nothing to lose, so you become completely comforable walking around with no dignity. And only then, can you step up to the podium as Zuma Dogg for two minutes at a time.

March 24, 2007 9:53 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

nndlsjuYep, most of us just wasted the ten years going to university and graduate school, then apprenticing at our respective trades.

Hell, we could have been degrading ourselves and in the streets, sleeping in vans, begging for food, gas and coffee, showering in public places (occassionally), never shaving and wearing a ski cap and cheap sunglasses.

Damn, look what we missed. And, because we missed it, we can't go waste everyones time and energy for two or three minutes on each issue that comes before public bodies.

And we are stuck with wives and kids and a mortgage, not to mention the bleak future of grandchildren and retirement.

What a loss. Where did we go wrong???

March 24, 2007 10:24 AM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


Damn bro, you read that whole thing and missed the entire point. Sorry about that. Maybe some other folks can try to enlighten this dark heart.

March 24, 2007 10:33 AM  

Anonymous Hooked on phonics said:

Dear 10:24am,

Please visit our website and use our products. You are suffering from an extreme reading comprehension problem. Sometimes it can be an emotional problem that is preventing you from being able to focus.

March 24, 2007 10:37 AM  

Anonymous anthony robbins said:

Dear Friends and Family of 10:24am,

After more than twenty years in my field, I can recognize a personal emotional crisis when I see one.

I would like to offer one free seminar ticket to my next "Unleash the Power Within" four-day seminar, that you have heard so much about, not only for you, but for your entire family. (Neuclear members only, not entire extended family. Extended family members may receive 20% discount. ID required.)

It saddens me to think of where you beloved friend and family memeber will end up, if you allow this emotional tailspin to continue. Pick up the phone, call the operator standing by. Use the promotional code "Mayor Sam's Sister City" for your free tickets to the next Anthony Robbins LIVE event for you and your nueclear family (and 20% discount for extended family members.)

March 24, 2007 10:44 AM  

Anonymous dr. wayne dyer said:

I agree with you, Tony. And would like to offer my "whole enchilada" you have heard so much about on PBS. Containing my video workshop, audio program, and accompanying workbook.

I'm sure it will provide you with the enlightenment a bitter, angry, defeated, sore loser like you can take comfort in.

March 24, 2007 10:47 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Thanks ZD, I think I know who, "Defeated Loser" is now. Why this guy would be envious of you, no offense, I have no idea.

If I am correct about, "Defeated Loser", this kind behavior is par for the course.

By the way there are a lot of folks in this town who are just one paycheck away from living in their van. I guess according to defeated loser, if you do not have money you should not have a voice!

March 24, 2007 10:55 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Defeated Loser's animosity towards Zuma Dogg is near irrational. By reading the postings I think I know who he is too but its all so odd.

March 24, 2007 11:58 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

If Zuma Dogg was Latino and they took his business away people would react differently.

As a fourth generation American and Angeleno of Mexican ancestry, I am ashamed of these "fellow" Hispanos in government and how corrupt they have become.

Anyone read the LA Weekly the other day?

March 24, 2007 12:00 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


Thanks. No offense as to wondering why ANYONE would be envious of ZD, that was the point I was trying to make. EXCEPT in one area. I stumbled into City Hall over the Venice vending ban that went into effect ONE YEAR AGO THIS SATURDAY. (it was sat march 25, '06, with april 4th being ZD CIty TV 35 premeier). So that's a lot of media attention and top of mind awareness in one year, for no money spent.

And, maybe the person used to be much more of a topic on this blog, than they are S.Z. (Since Zuma Dogg).

Any insecure, wannabee politician would want the same. Because they think there is only room for one. When there is room for EVERYONE who is able to bring something to the table.

So I had to reveal a little more about the behind the scenes of ZD to hopefully bring a little comfort to that person. But yeah, you can have it all, or at least a heck of a lot, but if you are a spoiled, obssesive control-freak, as this person is (whoever it is), it's the one thing that eludes you, that will wreck your spirit. And in a wannabees case, that is media attention.

And the funny thing is, I've already been walking the streets as an underground celebrity for five years, prior to City Hall, so I'm already so used to the accolaids, I moved to Vegas for eight months, to try and shake the whole ZD public act. Cause it WAS interfering with my daily routine in life. So I finally detoxed from ZD public life, after eight months in Vegas. And set up shop on Venice Beach, was moving in that direction (getting OUT of a public profile life -- pulling all my shows off the air,..so my public visibilty would die down.

Then Council unconstiutionally stepped on my income one year ago today...and now the ZD throttle is stuck in full gear, and I can't slow down.

So I think the past five years of producing my public access show, while getting feedback daily from the public as I lived my life on the streets (grocery stores, gas pumps, beaches, malls, coffee houses, bars, etc.) has been the focus group that allowed me quickly access public opinion, and recite it back to people with such a quick turnover.

And after five years of living as the star of my own world, with people stopping me everywhere I go, flipping out at the sight of ZD in person, the attention isn't anything new...although it is always welcomed and never minimized. Because it isn't easy to generate what it takes in order to have a stranger walk up to you as you are eating at Taco Bell and tell you how much you mean to them. And have them recite their special ZD story, or moment they've always wanted to share with me.

That's not WHY I do it. It is a by-product of what I have done. (Whoever the jealous hater is, is focused on the the percieved joy all of the attention would bring. THE LESSON I HAVE LEARNED -- AND THE REASON I THINK I FINALLY GRADUATED FROM "GROUNDHOGs DAY" is because it's all about doing the work and having the fun that gets you to the party. The creative outlet. I can move to Vegas and take my show off the air...or try and stay home from City Hall...but then I'm just cutting myself off from the creative outlet that keeps me from reverting back to the jealous, defeated, crybaby loser I USED to be.

I'm really not any more or less happy walking the streets, living in my van than I was living in a NYC skyscraper (with Rush Limbaugh, Paul Schaffer, McCaulley Culkin's family, and others), while eating at five star lunches and dinners daily.

There are moments, this past year when it IS extremely uncomfortable at certain times with no gas and food to keep me going. And I DO lose days of productivity at a time, as a result.

But, nobody cares how am I living the other 23 1/2 hours a day...All they care about is, "Hurray...he cranked out another half hour show (or was able to drag himself out of the gutter, to wait two and a half hours to speak for two minute. Because to the people watching...all they know, is they got what they were waiting for.

And I'm satisfyed enough with the result to keep squeezing out ONE MORE DROP of bitter ZD juice for two more minutes on TV 35, one more mayor sam thread, and one more call to talkradio.

Cause the after result is sweet. And that's why this guy is going nuts. And ZD seems to have achieved the perfect balance of sleep deprivation, lack of food, the right amount of FREE startbucks and prop 215 chronic...because I've written about 25,000 words this morning. So I hope this is it, kiddies...If the sun comes out, like I think it is, I'm gonna go meet matt dowd and sell some illegal insense. the cops aint gonna do shit, casue they know bill rosendoh's unconstitutional oridinance ,that put WAY more people out in the street than ZD, people with kids, parents who filed for welfare and food stamps for the first time, people who had to leave the city ,state and even country over this, is illegal, and LAPD doesnt want to get sued at the hand's of City Councils either

a) ignorance of the law.
b) complete and total shadiness.

March 24, 2007 12:01 PM  

Anonymous Captain Jack Sparrow said:

Good afternoon ladies and gentlemen (tips hat): We've taken our new grinderman out for a little gears and beers and the Grand Turk seems to be doing just fine. 'Im's one that can handle wenches, savvy?

However, if you will, I would like to point out that Mr. Dogg has only scratched the surface regarding false claims. How many times have you sots in City Hall heard one of the electeds say "Just expense it, who cares anyway?" See, there is the point. Someone does care, and if you are taking from the till to cover false expenses (i.e., making false claims) then your mitts should be smacked.

There is a forensic accountant who lives in Simi Valley named Tom. He is a hired gun and works downtown on only the very hush-hush high profile fraud investigation cases that are handled by a well known accounting firm. We have a nickname for Tom. We call him Digger. Digger is a one of the Five that has seen all 7 pirates in one place at one time, and Digger has also seen what some sots have "expensed" such as trips to Pebble Beach with cronies to discuss commercial development, which if you will is all fine and good because the best deals are done on the 8th hole at Spyglass, savvy? But if you are discussing something interesting....something like putting in a Home Depot at the corner of San Fernando Road and Fletcher Drive in Glassell Park or a hotel in the hills of Griffith Park, why then would you take a State Senator and his girlfriend, a lobbyist and his wife and a fellow Clowncil member with you and claim it as an "expense" to get reimbursed since you were the sot that footed the bill, savvy?

Or better yet, how about taking a few developers and their families, a State Assembly person, a County Supervisor and the chairman of a local Assembly District Central Committee to an exotic local to "discuss feasibility of constructing waterfront community in protected wetlands area," savvy?

Digger's personal favorite is the expense report for "lunch time theatre performance and lunch" that consisted of strippers and politicians at the Horsey Horsey Gentlemen's Club down in the South Bay area. And yes, the sot in question told the gentlemen host "I'll take this one. I owe you one anyway." That particular gentleman now serves in the State legislature.

Oh bugger. I feel a pink bismuth moment coming on.

March 24, 2007 2:37 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

cpt jack...raising the curtain a drop, y'all...yeah, yeah!!! Hope I didn't scare you without my glasses on, savvy. hooooooody hooooooooooo!

March 24, 2007 2:44 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Truly, you guys are a bunch of druggies who somehow survived the 90's.

The one who calls himself Zuma Dogg is the worst of the crew; he is a fool, a jester (in the very worst sense of the word) and a time waster of immense proportions.

So, the question is: Why does anyone in their right mind even bother with this idiot?

I think I know the answer: It is schadenfreud, a state of mind that allows us to rejoice in the sorrow and losses of others.

But who could hate this fool? Feel sorry for, yes.

Pity, yes.

Ignore, even better.

Guys, leave him alone and he'll go away. He thrives on your comments and cannot live without the pittance he gets from this blog and the scraps you throw him.

The opposite of love is not hate, it is apathy.

Forget this fool and get on with your own vacuous lives.

March 24, 2007 10:48 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

10:48pm says,

"Forget this fool and get on with your own vacuous lives."

I agree! You start! Ba-bye!

March 25, 2007 12:05 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

How many hits does this website get every day?

Why not post those numbers like other websites do?

March 25, 2007 12:35 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You should rename this web site what Zuma has on his. Its become the Zuma show and nothing more. Remember all the intelligent people who would post great dialogue to keep the issues going? They've left. Now its Zuma posting a thread then repeating his insanity 10 times posting on the comment side. Go be a rock star Zuma.

March 25, 2007 12:59 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I think this site improved greatly since councilman John left. I was getting tired of the whole Neighborhood Councils going to war crap.

Keep up the good work ZD.

March 25, 2007 1:15 PM  

Anonymous fourth floor employee said:

Zuma Dogg - You're the Man!

I agree with every word you wrote here and I can't figure out who the hater is. You are not the joke around City Hall so I don't think they know what they're talking about here. You are discussed at City Hall and yes, many times we are laughing but that is because you have just said something that we wanted to and couldn't. We get paid to cover the asses of the clowns and it's not our fault when you expose them for their two faced stupidity. We must brush by you with a pretend look of annoyance, but pay no attention to our stone faces. When you don't show up, we're bored. That is the truth that the hater should know.

March 25, 2007 10:57 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


Hell yeah...thanks for lettin' these fools know what time it is, y'all....

March 26, 2007 7:43 PM  

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