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Sunday, September 23, 2007

Leave LA?

Most of you know that last week I spent some time in Waterloo, Iowa for a family reunion.

About a year ago, I moved from the boring suburbs of Sherman Oaks to the heart of the urban and edgy NoHo Arts District.

At the time I was excited and thrilled to be part of such a city scene in an area on the upswing.

My trip to the mid-west had the effect of incredibly souring me on my hometown and the idea of a long term presence here in Los Angeles.

While some of you would probably relish the idea of the old, dead Republican mayor leaving town, I wonder what your views are for those of us who consider leaving town.

With rising home prices, crime, grime and never ending taxation and a general worsening of life in the city what options are there for those of us who would like to carve out a nice quality of life?

Over the next few weeks my "Leave LA?" series will explore some of the experiences I had while in the Midwest and contrasting life there to that here in Lost Angeles.

Perhaps you can help me make up my mind.

Labels:

55 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Don't let the door hit you in the ass, Mayor!

September 23, 2007 7:41 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You raise a serious issue about the quality of life in Los Angeles and whether we have reached a breaking point: where the cost of living, traffic, crime, graffiti, and City Hall corruption outweighs the weather, the breadth of things to do, and the delightful funkiness of the City in general.

The first comment above is typical of the shallow, moronic, assholes that now populate our City Hall to the detriment of anything formerly known as "the public interest."

September 23, 2007 7:52 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

752
Good point.

And 741 - I was expecting something a bit more creative?

September 23, 2007 8:24 PM  

Blogger exit said:

For us multi generation Angelinos who worked hard and thought the future was here we had our union jobs and doubled up on or principle payments to pay off our mortgages
And preserved our prop 13 and remained in the same house the last 30 years to avoid
The outrages house payments of today it’s not easy to walk away from a well thought
Out life. Who would have thought 30 years ago that Los Angeles would become what it
Is today. And if it was 30 years ago and I knew then what the future of Los Angeles
Would be my bags would have been packed.

September 23, 2007 8:46 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

The reason that so many people move from the midwest to here is because there is so little to do there. If you are satisfied with the limited choices of things to do and people to see, if you don't ski, love the mountains and beaches, the cultural experiences, etc., then that's the reason that the midwest was invented.

September 23, 2007 8:50 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You sic a smelly, ignorant and rude dogg and his buds on city hall and the city in general, forcing us to watch them drag out meetings, and you want people to give you "creativity" and sympathy?

Here's a serious idea for you: take the motley crue to Iowa, sic them on the local town hall there, and see how tolerant they'll be. That can be your litmus test.

You get clean and quiet and safe, and conformity and civility -- what is the balance YOU want? Before the Dogg and his kind, L A used to be both. Do you know it used to be run by polite society types, like Nancy Daly Riordan? (And whoever she's been married to before.) YOU and the Dogg are what you're now fleeing from... Ironic, huh? That and the Mexicans, I guess. Aren't there any in Iowa yet?

September 23, 2007 8:57 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

My friends - check out 857 - that is the future of your city right there!

September 23, 2007 9:01 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Mayor, I don't know of like or dislike you. I like your site and disagree with your tone often, but I enjoy the information. Anyways, this is a good question. I spent 2 years in Michigan and now that I'm back, I really do look back fondly at the little things in life. Simple living. I am on the market for a job and my wife and I can't wait to leave.

September 23, 2007 9:14 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Write your letters to the Mayor here is mine.

****************
mayor@lacity.org

Where are you now that you know 18th gang members killed a baby and are extorting money from the poorest of people in Westlake? After the May 1, McArthur Park you incident were on television many times helping to create a sense of fear of the police. Why don’t I see you making many public appearances and denouncing the action of the cowards who killed a baby and also extort street taxes from old ladies trying to make an honest living?

I find you actions reprehensible at best, instead of working to create a community in where the community feels safe and has confidence in the police you have polarized the community. It appears you are prepared to accept the conduct of cowardly killers on the street but will rally against the police almost immediately. I regret that I ever endorsed and supported you, you have lost the respect and confidence of this voter. I can hardly wait until we elect a new Mayor who will work to unite the city and make it a safe place to live.

September 23, 2007 9:14 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

That's exactly what the Clowncil wants, Mayor Sam.

They want good people such as yourself, and other honest, hard-working middle class people, to leave the city.

Once that happens, it will only be the very rich and the very poor. The politicians will do the dirty work for the former, and patronize and exploit the latter.

We don't want you to leave, but we understand that you have to do what's right for you and your family.

If you do, I just want to say, thanks for making life in this crazy city just a little bit easier(and a hell of a lot funnier)!

September 23, 2007 9:21 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

8:57, This is the typical drivel I've come to expect from one who is lonely and bitter because your plans for your life hasn't worked as well as you thought they would. Further, you are apparently not receiving the attention in life that you expect, instead you've become increasingly frustrated and vent your bile on those who you think are less deserving than yourself.

I suggest that you could use a skilled psychologist, but I cannot recommend one. Perhaps if you consulted the Yellow Pages?

The alternative would be some new-age hocus-pocus such as pyramid power, mood rings, pet rocks, Scientology, or tarot readings. This is if you feel you either cannot afford a psychologist, or think that you're the only sane one in the city and the rest of the city is crazy, so you feel you don't need one.

September 23, 2007 9:22 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

8:57pm,

LOL!

What an honor to be the problem with Los Angeles.

mayor sam, did you sic me and my buds on city hall? i thought we (zd/buds) were already going to city hall. then, through that, we discovered your blog.

but Mr./Ms. 8:57pm dumb-ass has his/her story as twisted as his/her panties.

and why would mayor sam want to start showing up at meetings in iowa? that city hall isn't run by a bunch of corrupt/extremist criminals.

but sam...iowa would be a great place to move to continue blogging about the criminals and political extremists who run los angeles city hall. that way you are sticking it to them, without paying in to their corruption/fee increases/taxes/non-profit scams.

September 23, 2007 9:40 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:


MayorSam,

Don't listen to the idiotic postings above. You see, they wouldn't understand.

You seem like a decent person, and decent people get upset at, oh, I dunno, things like gangs, smog, traffic, corruption, overinflated housing costs, etc.

The people criticizing you don't even know or care that this stuff is wrong. And that reveals volumes about them, not you.

The bottom line is that LA is increasingly a city of the clueless, out-of-touch rich and the shockingly uneducated, lawbreaking, blight-causing poor.

Yes, look to Rio de Janeiro and Buenos Aires. That is LA's future if nothing is done to the status quo.

Should middle class have to save for years just so they can live NEAR some gated community, where the rich have private police so the poor don't come kill them?

That's not my idea of America.

Should a city council tax homeowners to pay for "gang-intervention" programs? Only if they can GUARANTEE that the rest of our tax dollars (for things, like, hmm, I dunno, the POLICE, SCHOOLS, etc.) are doing their best AND that none of their cronies are running and making money off these "intervention programs."

Alas, the current leadership is frightening.

Why not move to anywhere USA, between Orlando and Parker, AZ? Same weather, nice people. And middle class folks can afford a house.

So, Mayor Sam, we would indeed miss you. But we feel your pain.

September 23, 2007 9:47 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Mayor Sam, I find myself agreeing with 9:21 - especially his last comment. In the short time I've visited your blog, I've found myself completely addicted to it, and found myself laughing at some of the idiocy coming out of the third floor chamber. Your blog, by the way, came highly recommended to me by someone I know in City Hall.

If you feel you must go back, you're going to leave a huge hole in the city, and we bloggers (no matter what our political beliefs) will witness the loss of a legend.

I imagine there will be a lot of characters who inhabit this blog that will find themselves at loose ends. A few come to mind: Red Spot, Mickey Finn, Joseph Mailander, Captain Sparrow, Zuma Dog, and that privateer Chapman with his quaint style of English.

I've gotten information here that I've not received anywhere else, and that's a huge bonus for those of us who would otherwise be uninformed voters.

Yes, I also wax nostalgic to the time I lived for awhile in the northwestern part of San Bernardino County, but when it came time for me to move back to L.A., I did so.

The L.A. of 30 years ago was better in some ways, and worse in others. I have to admit that L.A. is better in fewer ways, and a lot worse in more ways than 30 years ago, but as long as we're in the trenches fighting the good fight for transparency and accountability, I feel this blog is accomplishing something.

September 23, 2007 9:52 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You stay; kep MIlaander.

Send Dogg and Spot to Iowa or anywhere but here, in our face, ruining your blog.

We'll miss you; won't miss Dogg or Spot.

Let us know yourplans.

P.S. Take Hertzberg with you as well, please.

September 23, 2007 9:57 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

9:57, I can buy you a one-way ticket to a beautiful state hospital.

September 23, 2007 10:06 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

By the way Mayor Sam, how's the weight loss program coming along?

September 23, 2007 10:09 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

The problem (other than those you mention) is that City leadership is corrupt. It is beholden to special interests. As long as this is true, things will get much worse.

Now I know that many criticized Zev for being hypocritical when he said the city is being run by the developers. Unfortunately he is right.

Developers and lobbyists are running the city for their own personal profit. There is no planning. There is no vision. There is just greed for money and power.

Unless we get some leadership that puts the people ahead of the developers/themselves, don't hold your breath for anything other than more of the same.

As for leaving: I too recently went on vacation. The exposure to an environment that is not filled with traffic and density made me keenly aware of how bad L.A. has become.

Some will say: Why not just leave then? (see 7:41). The answer is a possibly irrational hope that by taking stands and fighting I can help L.A. get back on the right course.

Perhaps that is why you stay as well.

September 23, 2007 10:09 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Go back and be among white people, my brother.

Embrace the sheet-wearin', cross-burnin' you and get the shit out of Dodge.

The city's more than you can handle, so suck it up and go home.

With your right-wing tail between your legs.

Dumbass.

September 23, 2007 10:12 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Deletion alert to previous comment! Racism or reverse racism has no place here!

September 23, 2007 10:16 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Mayor Sam's home county back in lily-white Iowa:

White persons, percent, 2005 (a) 89.6%
Black persons, percent, 2005 (a) 7.8%
American Indian and Alaska Native persons, percent, 2005 (a) 0.2%
Asian persons, percent, 2005 (a) 1.2%
Native Hawaiian and Other Pacific Islander, percent, 2005 (a) 0.1%
Persons reporting two or more races, percent, 2005 1.2%
Persons of Hispanic or Latino origin, percent, 2005 (b) 2.5%
White persons not Hispanic, percent, 2005 87.3%

Run, boy, run! Otherwise all those dark-skinned, big-dicked Angelenos are going to get all your women!

Run, boy! There's nothin' to look forward to here but miscegenation!

September 23, 2007 10:19 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

10:19, you moron.

Is there something inherently wrong with a county being 87% white?

Would you comment that a county in Mexico was 87% Mexican, with shock and outrage?

Are you stereotyping African-American too?

Because I know you didn't mean Hispanics. That is laughable!

September 23, 2007 10:34 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Ah hell! Mayor Sam, maybe it's time for you to limit comments to those who are registered.

I know the above will kick me off, as well as some of the others, but slamming the owner of this blog is pretty stupid too, as 10:19 did.

I'll probably stay in touch through proxy.

September 23, 2007 10:36 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

This Council and Mayor are ruining this city by the hour. I own rental property and have tried hard to create affordable decent places to live without public subsidies.

Unfortunately this council and Mayor have made so I am not even able to earn an income in this city.

Myself and many others I know are all getting out of LA.

All of this Council and Mayor should be ashamed of themselves.

When those like Hahn want to create bonds for gangs and all of the councilmembers have hocked up this city.

ENRON! WE'RE GOING TO IMPLODE!!

September 23, 2007 11:05 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

What's the obsession with Hertzberg?

Yea I supported him for Mayor, yea I'd probably support him for City Attorney but I haven't blogged about him in a while.

Weird.

September 23, 2007 11:19 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

1009 - I've been working to change LA for nearly 10 years.

It seems like rowing upstream.

But you make a good point.

September 23, 2007 11:20 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

You know I actually saw more black people in Iowa and Minnesota than I see in LA. For what it's worth.

September 23, 2007 11:20 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

May I suggest before considering a move to another city check once and check twice
If the mayor of your new town is part of the cleaning of toilets crew of your new
Hometown

September 23, 2007 11:25 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Instead of taxing the city property owners to death, council should self-fund this program. Each councilmember receives $1 million in discretionary funding per year; I'm sure they could pool their discretionary funds together to fund this program - and give the poor taxpayer a break.

Hello to my brother Juan! When are we going get together for some menudo like we used to do on Saturday mornings when we were growing up? You've got my email address - send your reply there.

September 23, 2007 11:47 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You know I actually saw more black people in Iowa and Minnesota than I see in LA. For what it's worth.

That's not surprising, you live in the Valley and probably don't make it south of the hill often.

September 24, 2007 12:03 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I was born and raised in Los Angeles and have seen it deteroriate horribly. It never looked as badly as it does now. Growing up the Latinos born here took pride in their neighborhoods and the yards were kept up and clean, graffitti wasn't out of control, hardly no vendors, police had respect and now thanks to the Mecha Mayor and the morons on clowncil this city has turned into a 3rd world country. Huizar's district is one of the worst for sight. The illegals have taken this city down the toliet. Not one clowncil member has the leadership to announce to illegals that vending without a permit is breaking the law. So they do nothing and allow gang bangers to continue to extort. Will it take another killing to wake them up? Our schools, clinics, markets are all overcrowded with illegals. You go to the areas where they are and all the medicine has to be locked up. That shows what kind of people they are. You walk into stores and there's secuirty guards. We never had that growing up. If they got rid of all the illegals maybe we could have the our great city back.

September 24, 2007 6:10 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Whiner.

Just shut up and leave already.

Goodbye Cruel World whinging is just silly.

And typical, by the way, of right-wingers with a feeling of entitlement.

September 24, 2007 7:07 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

It depends how much "fight" is left in you. If you are like Roderick, then there's no "fight" left and there's no reason to stay. In the next 10 years, it will be a battle to sustain a decent quality of life. Many will just accept their fate, ie. more hassles to deal-with. Others will be activists on a mission. But either way, life in Los Angeles will not be characterized as idyllic.

People in Los Angeles will start living a compartmentalize life. The nastiness of crime (Bratton is such as failure), traffic (Villaraigosa is such a failure), taxes/fees (Villaraigosa is such a failure), schools (Villaraigosa is such a failure... poor public schools), etc. will not diminish. As is living in Japan, people just ignore the crowds and ugliness (but, they have little crime).

I believe the only hope for Los Angeles is the Borough system, small enclaves taking care of themselves (and I'm not referring to the Neighborhood Councils, which are a farce, a fraud, and a waste).

BTW, I've been thinking the same thoughts, of leaving L.A. Wouldn't it be easier for the City government to have a third world citizenry to deal with? Yes, it would. The powerful will be within gated communities and the masses will be in high-rise towers of a slum. The next election's results will probably be a big determinant of what the future 10-20 years may hold.

September 24, 2007 9:14 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I left this year after 59 years.

I tried really hard to make it a better place, or at least to hold the line.

When I finally realized that Tony Villar doesn't care if we live or die, I knew it was time to go.

8:46:

You can move your Prop. 13 tax base one time in your life. You have to be over 55, and buy a house of equal or lesser value than the one you sell.

We gave up a paid off house and took on a mortgage in the Autumn of our lives. It was a huge blow to our retirement plans, but we just could not stand it any more.

September 24, 2007 9:20 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Several days ago, some insightful blogger said:

"Welcome to the dying city."

Or some words to that effect.

There you go. Who could blame you?

September 24, 2007 9:24 AM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

Coupla notes

Skinny Bones Jones - weight loss is going well. Just went down a couple more shirt sizes.

Just to make it clear I am a born and raised native Angeleno. Well almost, I was technically born in Burbank but grew up in NoHo and other parts of LA City. Iowa is not my home, but its where my parents, grand-parents, great grand parents, etc. come from. About 80% of my family still lives there, mostly in the Waterloo-Cedar Falls area (home of the University of Northern Iowa).

I could care less about what races are there. There is not as much diversity as here but there is some. And I have to tell you that the "white" culture I experienced there was far more foreign to me than the Latino culture I grew up with. So I got to have a "diversity" experience even though the people looked like (sort of - some people think I look Hispanic) me.

Overall regardless of race, the people in Iowa were far friendlier and civil than say folks in Studio City, Sherman Oaks, the Westside, etc.

September 24, 2007 10:47 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

So, Sam, time to sic zuza dogg on those folks. Trash that civility, get a big laugh at how it makes the decently behaving people squirm, isn't that your big kick here, as you said yourself? You know, the middle class whites in most cities like in Iowa are nice but dull, not likely to be grads of Ivy universities, lucky to go to that Northern Iowa State.

So they just might be too flummoxed over what to do with homeless bums living in vans and berating people more powerful than they've ever met. Except when the candidates come down from Mt. Olympus to sweep through the state for the primary.

Obama IS a disaster, as somebody said, the one true comment so far.

Naive as a reverse-racist leftie ethnic on foreign policy, socialist in his taxation. (Edwards is the same, but he doesn't have a chance, except, LOL, as Obama's V P.) Even Hillary is moderate compared to them.

People are betting on Giuliani. You know, the one who's running on Bratton's record of cleaning up NYC. The Bratton who can do wonders when he doesn't have the Lefties and panderers on a Council tying his hands. And suing his butt all over the place so the cops he does have want to quit.

September 24, 2007 11:19 AM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

Several years ago someone told me this city's best days were behind it.

I didn't believe or want to believe it then.

But how long do you keep beating your head against the wall before you say "Ouch?"

September 24, 2007 11:30 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I would ask you not to leave. We need a voice of dissent in this city that is sadly missing from the mainstream media, especially the LA Times. Without someone who can look behind the curtain and see what is really there, then we all lose out.

September 24, 2007 11:38 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Mayor Sam:

Funny how some of those who preach "diversity" are the ones who attack those with opinions that differ from theirs. (Hello, 8:57 - how you doing?)

While I may not always agree with you, your perspective and blog are important for critical thinking in trying to make this city better.

You have made a difference. So, from a selfish community standpoint, what you do is an important part of the civic life of this city.

I hope you decide to stick it out and stay. LA is the city of the 21st Century and the foundation for its success or failure is being set now. I think everyone has moments where they feel disillusioned or want to throw in the towel.

No place is perfect, be it Iowa or Los Angeles. What you have to decide is if the pros of living here outweigh the cons and if the fight against the cons (no pun intended) is worth it.

I hope your decision is to stay.

September 24, 2007 11:48 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

One thing that's great about this country is that there is a place for everyone. Figure out what you want, find that place and go there.

You talk about how people are friendlier in Iowa, and you talk about the frustration of trying to change things in LA. One of your options is to go to Mayberry where people are friendly and the only arguments are whether or not installing the first traffic signal means the coming of urbanization.

So you move to a place where everyone knows everyone and there are no problems, what do you do with your life there? How do you make a difference in a meaningful way?

September 24, 2007 11:54 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

For the love of pete, Mayor Sam, just shut up and leave.

September 24, 2007 11:55 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

It is not just "Los Angeles", it's all around So. CA.
East L.A., Boyle Heights, Maywood, Huntington Park, South Gate, Pico Rivera, Montebello, La Puente, City of Industry, El Monte, So. El Monte, Pomona,and now even places with a little more diversity like Hacienda Heights, Whittier, Downey, and Rosemead.

Drive down Whittier Blvd. see how many "Tile" or "Window" places they have on one block right across the street from a place like Home Depot. If there was that much tile work to be done, how come the day laborers are not hanging out in front of these places?

Or look at all the little car dealerships that never seem to have people at them and cars that don't seem to be moved for decades.
It's not just five dollar tire places anymore.

A poll should be done on how many business owners in the S.E. have won the lotto to get their mexican restaurants. How many of them are multiple winners and big, longtime, campaign contributers to both the Democrat and Republican party.

CA is becoming a third world country. Finally, loyal, hard working Americans of Mexican descent are waking up.

Congress has an 11% approval rating even lower then the president. You think thats by accident?

Children in the community are lucky to even be counting to eleven, and these greedy elected officials are giving themselves raises.

How many "Latino's" in office are getting paid off to chant "Si Se Puede", and selling out their American constituents that voted their asses into office in the first place?

September 24, 2007 11:56 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

They're nice in the Midwest until you find out that nice man down the street is a serial killer who has body parts in his freezer.

As they say, the grass is always greener on the other side.

September 24, 2007 12:22 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

This website has long since degenerated into a racist cesspool.

Let it rot in peace.

September 24, 2007 1:13 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Oh my, look at 11:48. Most likely a city employee, a Field Deputy no doubt, and female. Ahah, you're monitored by the government!

But, this one has "no clue". It says, "LA is the city of the 21st Century and the foundation for its success or failure is being set now. " It believes the propaganda. Well, I'm sure you picked that one up well before this rebutt appeared.

L.A's success will only be realized if some areas "let go" of the other areas that are holding them down. City Breakup/Succession or Boroughs, at the least, is the only real solution. Otherwise, the city will continually and primarily depend on Federal handouts, as well as the smut industry to support it's third world ambiance.

September 24, 2007 1:24 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

It seems like the ones who should be leaving are all the ones who are spending them on this blog trashing the city. Why in the world do you stay in a place that you dislike so much? The cost of living is cheaper in Texas, Idaho, Arkansas, and Iowa.

September 24, 2007 3:02 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Predictible as it gets, everybody pulls out the race card when they don't like what is being said.

Greetings, from one "Latino" to another? Back at you.

A racist cesspool, or are you bothered that not all are as willing as others to "assume the position" ?

The irony is that 1:13 doesn't even have to view or post on this blog. They still a choice for what they want to do, For now.

As someone started the post, "Don't let the door hit you in the ass"

September 24, 2007 4:29 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Mayor Sam take the low life midget mexican mayor with you. Maybe reyes and huizar should go with the other mechiastas.

September 24, 2007 5:21 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

You can run but you cannot hide! You may be looking at Iowa now as a possible relief, but it won't be forever, by any means. The whole thing is sliding into the toilet and FAST. You are not just battling local city issues ... It is like droves of UK citizens bailing out and relocating to areas like Australia, New Zealand and even (believe it or not) South Africa! Bailing out for places that have the very same policies in place and before long will be no different than England. Just jumping from the frying pan into the fire. Stand and fight is really the only solution ... you WILL fight, be it here or be it there.

September 24, 2007 8:25 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Aye, 17:21! 'Twould be wiser to hogtie the three lads to a rail, an' give 'em the punishment common in me day.

Mayhap ye journey to the pits o' asphaltum 'pon the Rancho called La Brea. Whilst thou art journeying 'pon the road, thou shouldst stop at the landowner's house, an' barter or buy some o' his goose feathers. When thou cometh 'pon the pits o' asphaltum, pick thee up a few barrels o' asphaltum, an' make haste to thy pueblo o' Los Angeles.

Thou shall be most needful o' building a fire, an thou wilt place a caulderon 'pon the fire, an' add such asphaltum as ye hath gathered. Thou wilt heat the asphaltum in a caulderon 'til it becometh liquid. Then take to thee such brushes, an' old mops, an' thou wilt dippeth these into the caulderon.

Thou wilt place the rail 'pon that which thou hath hogtied the three lads a rod away from the caulderon an' thence apply a goodly amount of asphaltum 'pon these lads; covering them complete. Thou wilt place 'pon the asphaltum thou hath put 'pon the lads a goodly amount o' the goose feathers thou hast acquired in barter or coin.

When thou hast exhausted thine supply o' goose feathers 'pon the asphaltum covered lads, thou shall bring 'round a wagon an' a team o' horses. Thou wilt place the rail 'pon the wagon with the lads still tied, hitch thine team to the wagon, an' take the a whip 'pon the team's backsides, an' jump backwards in great haste.

Thou mayest say one to another, "We hath just run these lads out o' the pueblo 'pon a rail!"

Methinks thou mayest do so to the others which thinketh themselves as tax collectors, who hath voted to place another tax 'pon thy ballot on February next?

September 24, 2007 9:19 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

I appreciate Captain Jack and Joseph Chapman but fellas could we speak English here?

September 24, 2007 9:40 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Aye, Mayor Sam - mayhap perchance thou knowest not I doth speak the English which doth preceed thine own? 'Tis true - I do speak the English o' years gone past!

Me English - 'tis easily understood - by them what doth speak it!

September 24, 2007 10:23 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Cursed I be with this foul machine! It hath spelled me name wrongly!

September 24, 2007 10:27 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

California Indians take a poke at the Mexican

I don’t know what forum to bring this up in but it gave me a laugh when one of the tribes
Runs one of there 30 second PR spots they say the Mexicans came here and tried to break them up
Same date way back and they failed

September 24, 2007 10:59 PM  

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