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Thursday, July 31, 2008

Ass Clown Award nominations for the month of July

That time of the month again, here are your nominations for the coveted "Ass Clown Award"

1. Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa
2. Ryan Seacrest
3. Councilman Greig Smith
4. Councilman Jack "A" Weiss
5. The "Zorro Marxist"
6. California State Government
7. Councilwoman Jan Perry
8. CRA
9. "Old Gray Hag on Spring Street...for sale"
10. Grand Avenue Project
11. Don Quixote and friends
12. "Bloggin Burros" **by special request**
13. DONE's "Bong Water" Kim ** by special request, LOL!!**
14. LAPD Chief Bill Bratton **refer to comments above**

As always your thoughts and "bloggin comments" are greatly appreciated.



Anonymous Anonymous said:

This is a hard one as they can all be called ASS CLOWNS. Perry no doubt for going against fast food when her fat ass needs to lose weight.

July 31, 2008 6:56 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

The competition is too great to make any selection as being much different from another. BUT I would discount the non-individual nominees as too nebulous (not to be confused with "fabulous") when a principal PERSON behind each one could be named.

For the rest- skip SEACREST, he's supposed to make a spectacle of himself and he's not getting a government check on payday (I could be mistaken).

The category is strong with city government contenders. WEISS is the real malingerer, a real non-actor for his form of harm, much a passive-aggressive approach taken as the way to flip us off. The only weight to his placement here distinguished from his usual uselessness is the importance of “Zines’s Motion/Jamiel’s Law” that he continues five months after the murder. Special Category Nomination for that would be better.

GREIG SMITH has some blame but it's coming in spikes rather than everyday behavior, like his trash fee tongue-lashing spewed out to city residents on Monday instead of committing inanities daily. And I didn’t know that he was so knowledgeable on earthquake predictions at a time when the Cal Tech people say that scientifically, now, “No can do.”

JAN PERRY has done well to distinguish herself by the absurd intrusion into personal choice and her attempt to influence market forces by halting fast food business additions to south L.A. Another excursion into pipedreams, wishful thinking, social engineering or whatever you want to call this misdirection of government authority. GOOD CHOICE.

But don't forget RICHARD ALARCON, constantly reminding people of his experience as a STATE legislator and his regular exercises in intimidation and humiliation of whomsoever is presented at the council meetings to provide them with information. (CARDENAS, passed over this month, is right there with him for that self-serving style of exchange- both of them managing to avoid styles that don't highlight their own coolness.)

ALARCON has the added feature of creating a more divisive environment by bringing racial and ethnic overtones to most of what he does, which then further divides people. Although not alone in this, he does it best. This must be his plan so he always has "divisiveness" as a theme to complain about. His rants are, on occasion, quite stunning, though. He’s a racist- with more lots more polish and experience than most- but not acting much more dangerously this month than any other month.

HUIZAR- another who spikes on the regularity-scale of bad news. Interesting how he likes to send messages by what he does, as choosing to make only-in-Spanish comments to car wash workers, "washeros", yesterday. For all that non-Spanish speakers knew, he could have been telling the audience that the rest of the council were idiots and he’s their champion, and council, of course, would have applauded all this blindly. The “I’m like you” - “I live in Boyle Heights”- style is irritating. He skipped that style at the community meeting earlier in the week where he apparently was responsible for the police keeping community people OUT of the community “lecture.” He spikes.

MAYOR TONY- deserves his own special category as the ringleader, never failing to drive us all to a deeper, darker (and there's no racial/ethnic reference here- take if from a Latino on this one) more costly trip towards city destruction.

TOO TOUGH to SELECT JUST ONE. Sorry for the cop out here. As another cop out, we need a WEEKLY award to narrow the candidates more accurately and deservedly, and then a playoff for the month.

To: The rest of L.A. City council- take heart. Although not mentioned, you too can step up to this level of visibility next time, as EACH of you is easily just a hair’s breadth away from such recognition.

A Huizar constituent, a displeased one.

July 31, 2008 8:20 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

6. California State Government

July 31, 2008 9:20 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Whoever kept suggesting here that Zuma Dogg was going to get arrested at City Council, only to be wrong both days this week.

THAT is an Ass-Clown; one who ANONYMOUSLY makes BOLD predictions, and is 100% wrong.

Come forward ass-wipe, and accept your award.

July 31, 2008 10:30 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I'm sure 8:20's overlooking Don Quixote for the dubious Ass-Clown award was unintentional. He has been a long standing nominee over the months, and its time his face gets mounted on that ass. You can ignore his qualifications as an Ass Clown for only so long. Admit it. There's hardly a reader here or at the other blogs that hasn't said, "My God Quixote's an ass!"
So lets dispense with the fence-straddling and name him the Ass Clown and be done with it. There's is no more worhty candidate. Since there's no known photo of DQ use Geo Bush' photo with don Quixote's name. There's a certain poetry there.

July 31, 2008 10:36 AM  

Blogger Shelby York said:

Before anyone else does it, I'm going to nominate us. Go ahead and pile on, dum dums.

July 31, 2008 10:42 AM  

Blogger Shelby York said:

Um, I'm just kidding about the "dum dums" part.

July 31, 2008 10:43 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

after all his hard work at being a ass clown he is finally nominated,don quixote truly deserves this and it would make his grandparents as he likes to call them now so proud.

July 31, 2008 10:50 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Wet Spot is the Ass Clown.


July 31, 2008 10:55 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Can I just ask people to scroll down to the previous string to take a look at that John Kerry photo?

That is one disturbing looking person!

July 31, 2008 11:00 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Weiss - He refuses to allow the council to discuss Jamiel's Law. How fast would he act if a friend or family member of his had been murdered? Or would he be like the Parks sell-out?

July 31, 2008 11:12 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Weiss lives in Bel-Air. His family is not likely to be murdered by an illegal any time soon.

He comes from so much money that he can afford to hire actual Asian gardeners!

July 31, 2008 11:25 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Bump THIS guy up to the TOP of the list, the Dept. of Neighborhood Exaggeration's "BONG WATER" KIM, who's now falling on the heels of booted-out Andy Rooney-esque Greg Nelson in bumbling along out-of-touch.

1) He schedules TWO neighborhood council-related meetings at City Hall yesterday, at basically the same time (one 6-8 p.m., another starting at 6:30, 7 floors up), so the limited number of NC people available to leave work early and brave cross-town traffic at rush hour then have to split their time, or miss one meeting completely.

2) He "brags" at the beginning about how well one meeting (community input on the new "Carol Baker Tharp Neighborhood Leadership Institute" (a rehash of the poorly run DONE "Leadership Academy" for training NC leaders was attended -- because they ran out of chairs), but after he exits to go bumble through the OTHER meeting, everyone introduces themselves, and. . .

. . . of the nearly 60 people in the room, turns out only about two dozen are actually from the city's 90 neighborhood councils.

As per City tradition, when you can't REALLY get community activists to take you seriously, or value your programs, you pack the room with inside players for the sake of appearances.

So, here's the breakdown of the 60 people, as they stood and identified themselves: DONE employees - 7; employees of other city departments - 11; guests from "academia" - 6 (i.e., grey beards and philosophers who "study" L.A. NCs at universities, but have never ACTUALLY been a part of one); guests from non-NC non-profits and special interest groups - 10.

DO the math, then ask why BONG WATER believes DONE is having any impact on the REAL neighborhood council world.

July 31, 2008 11:27 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Zine, for announcing more than once that there's an earthquake during an earthquake.

July 31, 2008 12:18 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Make that two vote for BH Kim at DONE. Just a few weeks ago his department announced they had no money to support neighborhood council elections, which is why many chose to have the city clerk run them -badly. Then after many bailed, they announced that had lots of money after all and the ones who hadn't changed they election dates to the June clerk votes who get lost of financial support from DONE.

And, I think, this guy was supposed to be Tharps "numbers" guy.

July 31, 2008 12:55 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:




(Either "ass clown" or U.S. vice president. Both titles have the same prestige.)

July 31, 2008 1:14 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

DONE has announce they will have a "hot line" to answer NC problems.

Neat idea, except who will staff it? The regular employees don't even return your calls.

How about a few luke-warm lines first? Learn to crawl before you try walk.

July 31, 2008 1:19 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Remeber just two months ago, Kim was slammed by his own staff and a mgmt. consultant, reported here:


But in city govt. that means your due for a promotion.

July 31, 2008 1:22 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

How can you not pick someone with the nickname "Bong Water" - that alone is worth the price of admission.

July 31, 2008 1:27 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:




He's been a city department GM for at least 10 weeks - so he's overdue for trial by fire. Don't wait until AV fires him to take a stand.

July 31, 2008 1:32 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Don't forget, Mayor V. has a similar sounding (honorary) Korean name. He's called:

Hwam Bam (thank you ma'am)

July 31, 2008 1:35 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

1:32 may have a good point. You have to break these six-figure income GMs in right, or they start believing they own this town.

(And we all know Eli Broad is actually the registered owner of the City of L.A.)

July 31, 2008 2:21 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

"Okay, Mr. Board, pull the city over. Where's the fire? I'm gonna need to see license and registration for metropolitan area you're driving there."

July 31, 2008 2:37 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I feel sorry for B-HK. As the GM of D.O.N.E, he has to man the front lines of making city activists think they have some say in how government runs here.

That's a mighty big facade to have to hold up with so little experience in creating world class BS.

If he can pull that off, even for six months, he's up for an even better-paying job with the new
"Tooth Fairy is Real" campaign. Or, even more daunting, the "Villaraigosa's a Competent Mayor" Coalition.

July 31, 2008 2:43 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

And, he gets new initials. He'll be: B-S Kim.

July 31, 2008 3:42 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

What about RED SPOT/JOSE AGUILAR - he get nominated every time, and somehow doesn't win.

July 31, 2008 7:39 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I vote for Seacrest. I've been told by several radio DJ's that he had to perform certain special services to Merv Griffin to get his job.

Okay, okay, so what's new? But still, the guy should have an honorable mention for the couch interview.

If not him, then how about Jimmy Blackman for his many couch interviews that provided job protection to all the minority women working on the 3rd floor?

July 31, 2008 9:36 PM  

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