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Saturday, March 31, 2007

Memo to L.A. City Council: Don't paint squiggly mulit-color decorations on the road Friday at 5:00pm anymore, please.

(Pictured: The future of L.A. with more high density projects and the road improvements to accomodate)

To: Mayor Antonio Villaraiagossa and Los Angeles City Council
Fr: Inspector General Zuma Dogg
Re: Painting multi-color, squiggly lines on the road, for decorative purposes during 5pm Friday Rush hour.
Dt: March 31, 2007

Dear Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa and YOUR Los Angeles City Council,

People accuse the City of "bad planning" and overall dim-witted judgement. And that saddens Zuma Dogg. Because Dr. Deming taught me that people are already trying to "do their best". But I don't think he ever checked the LA City Ethics Commission web site.

But here's something that doesn't call shadiness, fraud or abuse into play. Only waste. And the solution seems pretty obvious. But maybe there's more to the situation, and if there is, I'm sure someone from City Hall will post it. If not, no wonder people say L.A.'s planning is so bad, it's actually a safety hazard.

You see yesterday, a constituent we all know and love was trying to drive down Cahuenga, in Tom "What's His Real Name" LaBong's district. (No, it wasn't me, I said, "we all know and love".)

Only problem, was the road was shut down to one lane. Because they were painting mulit-color wavy/squiggly lines on the road, which seemed to be for no other reason than decorative purposes. (Council approved graffitti, if you will.)

And Zuma Dogg ain't against painting no mulit-color, squiggly lines for decorative purposes...IF YOU WERE DOING IT ANY- OTHER-TIME, THAN FRIDAY AT 5PM. Because you see, there was also a fire burining, so traffic was all messed up from that, too. This kinda demostrates the problem that too many more high density projects are gonna have on the infrastructure. Cause it's bad enough the area is shut down because of a tragic arson fire. But you gotta go shut the road down to one lane to paint some squiggly lines at 5pm on Friday. And the constituents JUST WEREN'T PREPARED FOR THE DOUBLE BAMBOOZLE.

Were you?

In summary: To help prevent people from saying Los Angeles City Hall is bad at planning, don't paint multi-color squggly lines on the road for decorative purposes during rush hour traffic hours. Do it some other time.

And while you're at it: DON'T SPEND TIME AND MONEY ON COMMUNITY OUTREACH AND OUTDOOR BANNERS ENCOURAGING PEOPLE TO PARTICIPATE IN LOCAL GOVERNMENT -- THEN MAKE THEM WAIT THREE HOURS TO SPEAK TWO MINUTES. Cause MOST of the people who cleared their calander to be there, spent the time and money on gas and parking to come down, left at some point of the three hour wait.

But, ZD knows that's what you wanted...And now, so will everyone else. And since you made the people who elected you to represent them, wait three hours -- while you ran a three hour "waste parade" through Chambers, both of these stories just went to #1 with a bullet on the ZD topic list and will be making all the rounds on TV 35, TalkRadio and blogging.

Next time take public comment FIRST, before your three hour "waste parade" where every CM has to jump on the ass-kissing float.

Yours in Methods for Management of Quality and Productivity and Good PR,

Inspector General Zuma Dogg

p.s. Time to start planning 4th of July fireworks. Remember to shoot them UP into the air -- not sideways INTO City Hall.
- Possibly W. Edwards Deming

Official Zuma Dogg Website
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ZD Google Search -- Triumphantness, y'all!


Since it was me who actually saw the zig-zag line painting crew in Tom LaBong's District, I tell you a little more.

The fire above the Oakwood Apartments in Universal City caused traffic to back up on all freeways in the area.

So at 5pm on a Friday, when the traffic is worse than usual, we have one lane of traffic on Magnolia Blvd. at Tujunga closed so that city crews can paint multi-colored lines on stamped asphalt at the intersection.

This was really a dumb move. That intersection is near onramps/offramps for both the 101 and 170 freeways. Why couldn't this work be done earlier in the day.

Also I am curious to know how this design was chosen. It really doesn't fit in with the other things at the corner, including the statue of aviator Amelia Earhart.

You've got to love this city!

Mayor Sam

AND ON THE ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OF THE VENDING BAN ON VENICE BEACH THAT IS ABOUT TO GET KICKED TO THE CURB LIKE THE CHEAP HOs WHO AUTHORED AND VOTED FOR IT, HERE'S A CLIP FROM LAST YEAR'S PROTEST CONCERT HOSTED BY DOWD, HUNT & ZEE...And now...talented hand made t-shirt painter -- now stripped of his first amendment right by 15 mutherf*cjkers: TONY B. CONSCIOUS, Y'ALL...(He's even a better freestyler than Zuma Dogg, y'all!)

Free Style At Venice Beach Awsome Freestyle - Watch the best video clips here


Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

What a day at the local cafe in Malibu:

Today, i saw one of my ALL TIME FAVORITE RAP MOGULS!!! (Suffice to say without this guy's influence, there would be no ZD wannabe hip hop person.)

I walked up to him, he remembered me from a few years ago, when we chilled at some malibu bars.

He's VERY warm and charming in person. I told him all about how shady and corrupt the mayor and city council is and how they banned the stuff on Venice.

He was interested in how they were able to impose that ban. So i told him, city hall will just pass whatever ordinance they want, in viloation of state and federal law -- and ignore charter law for construction money, then it's up to the people to protest publicly -- but that hardly ever works -- except for a handful of political activists who have to dedicate all their time to it --

OR, you gotta SUE THEY ASS, which is really the only thing that works.

Plus, Oliver Stone was here today (but I just stared at him, rather than talk to him, cause I don't do that kinda entertainment).

And, John Savage from Deer Hunter approached ZD, was looking over his shoulder and aksed, "What's your blog address, again?" (I didn't know who he was at the time), he was very friendly -- then everyone at the local cafe got kinda excited for ZD cause he's famous for being a politically active guy, himself, and they all admired his acting so much, and they thought it was hilarious that I didn't know who he was, but he must have known who I was. (He was trying to remind me of a previous encounter we had recently!) YEAH, YEAH!!!

Plus, Alec Baldwin was here, too...and it was hilarious, cause some paparazzi were waiting outside...So I aksed Alec if I could walk out with him, to get snapped with him by the Paparrazi (a common ZD tactic used with Speilberg, Jillian Barberi and others). So I walked out with Alec, and the paparazzi snapped away, with ZD side by side -- and maybe it will say in the Enquirer, Alec Baldwin and unknown freind in Malibu. (LOL!)

Meanwhile, there are paparazzi photos where it looks like Jillian Barbieri is on a date with ZD!!! (The photog PROMISED he was going to send them to me, but I guess no one is meant to have THAT triumphant of a day."

AND OH YEAH -- while sitting in this Malibu cafe, surfing the next, the VH1 camera crew happened to be walking by taking "B" roll footage of the Malibu scenery. And they saw me sitting here, and were STOKED, because they needed some additional ZD footage for the V-spot -- so although I was delerious from no sleep and no food and overall bitter conditions, I squeezed out a few segements for them, on the spot -- and they were amazed, once again, how ZD continues to be Mr. "One Take, Check The Gate" Dogg.

But nothing was more exciting recently than when ZD approached Dennis Franz (since he was sitting there talking to everyone who approaced him, and was friendly and accomodating). But I waited till the store was closing and we were walikng out, and I told him how much I enjoyed his work. And shared a story from the time I worked as an extra "cop" on NYPD and was side by side with him all day, but hadn't seen the show. And as I turned to walk away, I said, "My name's Zuma Dogg, thanks for taking some time."

And he says, "Oh yeah, I've seen you on TV." Then gives me a Sipowitz stare, focusing in a bit and says, "Keep doing what you're doing."


Meanwhile, I got riffs to work on, cause a national producer wants to records my songs for his bands upcoming national album. (That's an "extreme finger crosser" but the producer did tell another producer, "Zuma Dogg just came up with the most insane riff ever." (Which I DID, but how awesome and insightful for him to hear it that way!)

PLUS -- get ready for ZD's reality camera, this WED at Downtown City Hall -- pending final confirmation.


PLEASE ATTEND THE 10AM COUNCIL MEETING, THIS WEDNESDAY AT THE FRAUD FACTORY ON SPRING STREET. We can meet in the rotunda and everyone can say their little "public comment" for ZD's reality camera.

And security, don't trip...It's just gonna be one camera guy. So nothing different than before, just a little bigger camera. And it'll be for a cable TV pilot.

STAY TUNED TO MAYOR SAM AND SEND ME AN EMAIL AT zumadogg@netzero.com if you want updates.

(and haters, don't trip on the length of this post. my cell phone is broken still, so this is my smoke signal message to a couple folks -- and maybe some others get a chuckle out of it...and if you don't like it, scroll down and send me a donation so I can get my phone fixed.

And thanks to Dan Corteze who just rolled up on Big ZD to tell me he saw my youtube videos from city hall, yeah, yeah...

I better keep sitting here, y'all...yeah, yeah!

March 31, 2007 6:36 PM  


I'm posting up a little comment about the photo, terrible shot, this is exactly what we are building towards. If you provide, build, allow, construct to accept this type of congestion, thats what we will have, it is as sure as we make it to be (terrible planning) unless this is what City of Los Angeles is striving for.

I had a beautiful day out in San Dimas, somewhat pleasure, mostly encouraging youth to become brighter more productive adults. I was invited to participate at 'Camp Glen Rockey' a youth correction/detention center, as part of a day for honored festivities.... "Car Show, Motivational Speakers, and Live Entertainment (Mr. Oogum Bogum 'Brenton Wood' & Rocky Padilla, also Indian Dancing).

Would you believe at 9:45am to 10:30am on the [10] freeway east (Saturday) it is full of cars - creating traffic. Most East L.A. drivers know that the [10] starts slowing/stopping just after Fremont by the [710] junction, only to get worse as the Rosemead off ramp is in view. Noticing what was about to take place,[same oh, same oh, *TRAFFIC*] our driver had began to implement a factoring change in habits to reduce congestion. ~~~> Yes he was actually 'eliminating traffic'.


Nothing much more to say, but a comfortable cruise at the speed limit.... from Atlantic to the [57] freeway north into San Dimas.

To quickly touch on the street painting..... off peak crews start anywhere from 3:00pm to 4:00pm on through to the mid-night hours (I am not a time keeper) to be relieved by the graveyard shift. Since city business closes at 5:00pm this is the crew that would be dispatched to work, the bad part about it is if they do not close the street or prepare for duties it will seem the whole group stood around and did nothing for 4 hours, then go take lunch break and come back to have little production, now turning 11:00pm and preparing to return to the yard.~~~> public hates that

Of course no one last week new of the event to take place (skyscraping flames) to give the crew a day off. HARD DAYS. I would like to see what was actully so important anyway to close the street down for a floor mural..(so it seems)

Don't let this be our biggest concern, we have hundreds of minors in facilities attempting to become productive citizens. I hope you all know that I was at the 'Senate Public Safety Committee' Summit a couple of days back, where Connie Rice made a remarkable presentation of testimony and a 9 inch report (that we all here know about) costing ........ HOW MUCH????

Doing my part today and doing what I did the other day fulfills my word that I am making a difference. Only thing is, Senator Romero has my 2 page Attachment to the 'Rice Report', as part of my written statement for ~~~~~>>>> FREEEEE

BIG CHANGES IN L.A.P.D. they get upgraded to a more credible position. 'They Are ENFORCED' Hopefully to never be advertised by any City Official (including MAYOR..................................... Sam) as being under-policed. *NEVER*



March 31, 2007 7:42 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


I enjoyed your post...Were you this good, all along, or just seem to be smarter in lower case!

Anyway, ZD has gotten good constituent feedback on Anthony from his district. He actually is an "honorary field deputy" in his district who works with Huizar's office on some of the day to day things like potholes, abandonded cars, bulky items that need removal, street lights that need repair, stuff like that that, that helps improve the quality of the district.

So I don't know if people knew that about Anthony. And now that he is typing in regular cases...maybe you want to know.


March 31, 2007 8:21 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

Since it was me who actually saw the zig-zag line painting crew in Tom LaBong's District, I tell you a little more.

The fire above the Oakwood Apartments in Universal City caused traffic to back up on all freeways in the area.

So at 5pm on a Friday, when the traffic is worse than usual, we have one lane of traffic on Magnolia Blvd. at Tujunga closed so that city crews can paint multi-colored lines on stamped asphalt at the intersection.

This was really a dumb move. That intersection is near onramps/offramps for both the 101 and 170 freeways. Why couldn't this work be done earlier in the day.

Also I am curious to know how this design was chosen. It really doesn't fit in with the other things at the corner, including the statue of aviator Amelia Earhart.

You've got to love this city!

March 31, 2007 8:26 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


Is this Art Bell stuff? Has anyone heard of it. Anything credible regarding this? Here's the Wikipedia take:

Chemtrail theory
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Chemtrails refers to a group of conspiracy theories regarding unnatural vapor trails in the sky which allegedly hold chemicals. According to theory proponents, chemtrails form when certain aircraft (in certain places and at certain times), leave behind contrails, thought to be laden with chemicals, that linger far longer than usual. Chemtrail theory disputes the conclusion that aircraft contrails are nearly always formed by condensation of water vapor at high altitude. It is quite distinguishable to the contrary, however, that due to various FAA-regulated state weather modification programs and even national, Federal-mandated, "global warming mitigation" operations performed by defense industry contractors like Raytheon and BAE Systems, "chemtrails" are just a new name for an already existing sub-covert practice.

Proponents of aerosol operation speculation maintain that some trails have an appearance and quality different from those of normal water-based contrails, i.e. that chemtrails are not consistent with the known properties of contrails. The general unifying factor is the generally conspiratorial belief that some kind of chemical or biological agent is being released. The term "chemtrail" should not be confused with other forms of aerial dumping (e.g. crop dusting, cloud seeding or aerial firefighting). It specifically refers to systematic, high-altitude dumping of substances such as barium oxide, trimethyl aluminum, liquid propane, and mycoplasmas for disclosed purposes of geoengineering (mainly in European countries) resulting in the appearance of these supposed chemtrails.

Among the proposed purposes of the alleged "chemtrails" are: atmospheric and weather modification, biological warfare, mind control or occult purposes. Such activity is outlined in various Air Force Articles, including those found at http://www.fas.org.

They are also theorized to be part of a system to counter the effects of global warming, to create a cheap wireless communications network for the military (by making the air more electrically conductive to microwave and radar signals), or to create a more sophisticated radar system with applications to both national defense and scientific study, such as those described within the HAARP project and the VTRPE project.

March 31, 2007 8:35 PM  

Anonymous Matt Dowd said:

I don't buy it

March 31, 2007 9:21 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


thanks. make any money out there...what happened. how was it. i keep forgeting to check the venice webcam.

March 31, 2007 9:27 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Zuma, your letter to the mayor was the highlight of the month. Come on Tony, give us a response.

March 31, 2007 9:35 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Interesting. Anthony works for Huizar?
Is that right?

March 31, 2007 9:54 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I hope all those celebrities are carbon neutral. Did they ride off on their bicyles?

March 31, 2007 10:08 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

no anthony doesn't work for huizar...but i understand he is a proactive constituent who tries to work with his council office to let them know about the types of things I mentioned.

maybe anthony can tell you more, or anyone else that is familiar with the situation.

Carbon neutral. LOL! I did see an armoured mercedes, some bentleys, ferrararis, masseratis, and all other kinda crazy stuff. Man, don't even try and step to this plaza in a Lexus, or you'll get you ass laughed off. BMW MINIMUM, if it's a shiny big new one.

Of course being Malibu, it's all mixed in with trailers, AMC pacers, pintos and ZD's van. And we all stand in line together at starbucks, where ZD has been elbow to elbow with Tom Hanks, and he didn't even know he was only the SECOND biggest star in the bucks.

But oh yeah, I did see a couple of those hybrid cars, or whatever...THOSE POSERS!

March 31, 2007 10:36 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Did any of you go the the Avanzando event on Friday?

Did you see Monica Garcia's dessert? A cake (carried in by three waiters) which she ate all by herself.

The woman is humungous! And so were the loud and obnoxious low-life gang bangers at that table (Deloitte sponsored).

Gloria Molina looks like Penelope Cruz when placed next to Garcia.

We understand newly elected gains a few pounds but this woman has gained a few tons!

March 31, 2007 11:16 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Chemtrails is hogwash. Art Bell is a psycho.

March 31, 2007 11:51 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Someone soon need to do an intervention on Monica Garcia.

March 31, 2007 11:51 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:


Mark from Florida says Hello.


April 01, 2007 12:01 AM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:

Hi Lennie,

Tell Mark "From Florida" to send some construction campaign contributions back to the district. Florida is known for that, y'all!

April 01, 2007 7:56 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

In addition to being a fool, you are a starfucker.

April 01, 2007 8:59 AM  


Zuma is absoluetly correct in his evaluation, as part of what he describes on my services to society. Listen to what he says....(read what he types) I don't work 'for' the Councilmember, I work 'with' the Counclmember. Just as I work with Ed Reyes, Herb Wesson, Antonio Villaraigosa, Tom LaBonge, L.A.P.D., Fire Dept.#47, Bernard Parks, and soon Janice Hahn to resolve many constituent issues (some major).

If the anony'mouse' is not comfortable with that, maybe they should try working with thier councilmember to be productive, and if you work for a councilmember give them the good word about me. I would also say, stop spending so much time here and fulfill some of the duties you are being paid for, seems like I have more credentials to replace some city staffers.

I have always supported my Councilmember, as I see it, I am supporting my community by providing the services the city offers to make thier daily life in Los Angeles brighter. Looks like Jose needs a strong field deputy and we have talked in the past [I am still available].

Hey ZUMA, thank you for the compliment on my post, as you noticed my message has only changed in 'type size' (I don't care for it much - bothers my eyes) but I guess I have gone from being good to great~~~(or great to genius). Still the same old brain working over here, you know I am working on my 5th publication and meeting the needs of the many residents who already refer to me as the~~~~'CITY GUY'.

You know how to reach me, like L.A.P.D. or Councilmembers, just give me a call to the 'Batphone'.

You already know what you have done to make an impact, keep it up, you are witty, sharp, outspoken, and more times than not, correct. See you at one of the BIG music events soon.


April 01, 2007 9:08 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Are you pimpin yourself to Huizar? For a "f" job? Anthony, there's an infinitesimally thin line between confidence and arrogance. Nobody enjoys being in the company of an arrogant person. Even arrogant people will admit they dislike pomposity -- in others anyway.

The problem is that most people have difficulty differentiating between the two. You need to exude confidence, not cockiness. So what defines a confident person? What does arrogance consist of? And most importantly, how can you be one without falling in the other's trap?

Before you can change your ways and see the light, you need to recognize what confidence and arrogance are. Unfortunately, our society encourages shrewd business deals and below-the-belt punches, which aren't the niche of alter boys. Confidence alone can and should get the job done, but it's often easy to fall prey to pomposity. Learn the difference.

April 01, 2007 3:50 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


I think I know who 3:50pm is and I'd say I think he must like you, otherwise he would have attacked you in a more broad and overall manner and question your heart and dedication, which he didn't (so that's cool and I if I read into it, right honors your work.

So all I would say, if I were to read into Anthony's comments, is maybe he suffers from the same thing ZD suffers from...underdogg complex. Anthony has sent me press releases and called me on the phone before to tell me what he's up to, and I saw him at Huizar's NC send-off/avoid debate party, and his Zumaness on his most recent post doesn't reflect his attutide as I've encountered.

BUT HELL YEAH....ROSE HILL REVIEW DOING BIG-BIG T'INGS IN CD 14!!! And you don't need a title to do that, y'all...Just aks Batman, Spiderman, or Zuma Dogg! And 3:50pm, you keep outing yourself to ZD, cause you're the only one who is that articulate on the blog. You must have been an "A" student! LAUSD, BABY!!!

April 01, 2007 5:36 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Zuma, I do like Anthony's work.

April 01, 2007 8:31 PM  

Blogger Zuma Dogg said:


April 01, 2007 8:58 PM  

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