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Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Greetings, LA!

Holiday greetings! Holiday cheer!
(Be happy it happens but once every year!)
Your'e high on tamales, you're topped out with eggnog
And couldn't care less about stuff at our weblog.
But now that you're woozy, hey, what could be worse
than bidding year-end love to our foils in verse?

I wish I had hundreds for seats at the Lakers;
Instead, here's two cents for all of you shakers!

~~~

The best to the Mayor (who was once known as Villar)
And to all the flacks who churn out his PR,
And with New Years a-coming, prepare the confetti
For Pro Tem Greuel and Eric Garcetti
We hope that Parke Skelton takes down time at home,
(he runs everything, you know---even this poem!)
And peace to those fabled ol' gunslingers, bless 'em:
Councilman Smith & Councilman Wesson.

Good new year to Orlov and Kathleen Nye Flynn,
That ZeeGuy named David, and my very own Lynn,
And Matt Welch, who sorts out some big fishwrap messes
And hi, Tony Castro (stay clear of those dresses!)
And LA's celebs, too many to mention,
And Rich Alarcon (does he need more pension?)
Best wishes to Huizar and his cut-and-paste crew,
And the Westside White Guy and Eastside Guy too!

To Janice Hahn, and Dave Tokofsky
and Eli Broad, Zev Yaroslavsky
Jon Regardie and Richard Katz,
O'Malley Miller and Carol Schatz,
Another big year for Kirkie Kerkorian,
And lots of campaigns for Eric Hacopian
And dear Nick Pacheco, may your personal saga
stay somehow entwined with Bob Urteaga.

And blessed be our readers---they click from afar
(Skid Row, Camarillo, and Pete's Topless Bar)---
Here's wishing good '7 to reader Matt Dowd
And all of the hard working EAA crowd,
We hope that Dockweiller Mutt will thrive
As well as Soccer-ball-on-the-605
and Capn' Jack Sparrow (who's doffing his cap)
And Parque Esquelto (when he wakes from his nap).
Let's say "Hear ye, hear ye!" for the London attire
of Big Don Garza, our City's Town Crier!
(But where are those 80 FAKE NEIGHBORHOOD WATCHES?
And MEAT--is he working--or flat on his haunches?)
Hey, good luck to that woman so smart and refined:
Anonymous---more prolific than all fools combined.

Lastly and leastly, throw a log on the fire
For big MayorSam, and W. Moore, Esq.,
and Jennifer Solis, and ZumaDogg too
and a whole bunch of others (if you only knew!)
Great health in 07 to Jim Alger--the best!
and Councilman John, and all of the rest.

And from one certain scribe, a notorious meany
who's sipping his year's last perfect martini,
and who took far too much of your breaktime to say:
may '07 be joyous for all in LA!

25 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Thank you Joseph. Let's keep our fingers crossed that we start 2007 with a great bang and celebrate hopefully that David Hernandez and Ted Hayes win in court.
My 2007 resolutions:
Try not to be so hard on Zuma but he drives me crazy
Make Antonio accountable for doing a lousy job as mayor in 2006
Demand Laura Chick N Shit do an audit on gang programs
Demand clowncil stop wasting our tax dollars
Keep complaining about the lousy reporters we have in LA

December 27, 2006 2:06 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Spasibo! Joseph
Happy New Year!

Luv,
Emma

December 27, 2006 2:12 PM  

Anonymous Captain Jack Sparrow said:

Good afternoon Joseph (looks surprised):

I say, have you and our bard been chatting on the divine divan? This time, you outdid yourself sirrah. Methinks it makes the usual yo-ho, yo-ho, a pirate's life for me that rolls off of my tongue, if you will, look rather tame.

But then again, in this town a good tongue job will get you everywhere, savvy?

December 27, 2006 2:17 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Captain,

Happy New Year! Take each day
and be thankful for your maroon velvet divine diva.

Cheers.

Emma

December 27, 2006 2:24 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Why is Hose Huizar hired majority anglo staff?

December 27, 2006 4:30 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Kevin de leon related to Dolores Huerta?

December 27, 2006 4:36 PM  

Anonymous Matt Dowd said:

AV 1381 lol what a great gift that was . thanks Dzintra

December 27, 2006 4:52 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

4:30

Because no qualified Latino will work for Jose Huizar after they find out why the other Latino staffers left. None of these white staffers have any chance of being elected in this district. Latino staffers might stand a chance but not if they were accessories to what Jose did.

December 27, 2006 5:20 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

5:20 I'm all ears. What did Jose do?

December 27, 2006 5:50 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Why are developers looking for 40 million tax break from city of l.a for downtown grand av dev.

December 27, 2006 6:32 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

The tax rebate request has buoyed critics who question the city and county's financing help for Grand Avenue.

"I want to ask, 'Do the people of South-Central, East L.A. and the Valley have to subsidize yuppie housing downtown?' " said Joel Kotkin, a Southland author and commentator on urban issues. "Where is our City Council and our progressive mayor on that issue?"

Jon Coupal, president of the Howard Jarvis Taxpayers Assn., said the continuing negotiations over tax givebacks point to the problems that occur when governments decide to help finance private developments.

"I have respect for developers," he said. "They are good businessmen. But they are businessmen interested in the bottom line, and they will negotiate the best possible deal for themselves. Often what is the best possible deal for them is not the best deal for the taxpaying public."

December 27, 2006 6:38 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

5:50 Yeah, I bet your all beard to. Keep Parke in suspense 5:20.

December 27, 2006 6:57 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Parke doesn't give a shit. Huizar's win is anothers loss.
Done Deal.

December 27, 2006 7:58 PM  

Blogger Mayor Sam said:

Thanks Joseph! That was awesome!!!

December 27, 2006 8:32 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

7:58 If Parke doesn't give a shit, why is he raiding Alvin's campaign staff and putting all these "feelers" out there. Alvin knows something that's got Parke worried. It's not as if Jose can run on his accomplishments. And God knows Jose didn't accomplish much in the school board. All he did and what he continues to do is line developer's and Parke's pockets. Remember, Parke was Alvin's wife's consultant - what does Alvin know about Parke?

The plot thickens!

December 27, 2006 9:31 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

"why is he raiding Alvin's campaign staff"

Specifically, what staff are you referring to? Parke is Parke. Alvin is Alvin. What do you think will happen in January?

December 27, 2006 9:42 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Since Barrio Planners, Inc. is a private for profit corporation, the only way they can be audited is by them volunteering their books or through a federal investigation by the FBI and an assigned Deputy Attorney General - just like the ones prosecuting Albert Robles from South Gate. Usually somebody in the organization will sing to get immunity, and that is where most of the illicit acitivities are brought out to the open - this is exactly what is happening in the Robles case. If there is enough suspicion - not even evidence - a Deputy AG can obtain a federal search warrant and confiscate any and all material from Barrio Planners offices. Since Gloria Molina and her husband are involved Cooley won't dare take such action. But then again he doesn't need to since we are talking about federal money. As such, any investigation falls directly under the AG's office.

Investigators usually try and tie in either large donations or large purchases. Gloria and Ron have been busy buying up beach front property in Ventura County and snatching up apartment buildings in the San Gabriel Valley, funny since Ron's business - PeopleWorks recently went under. And SVREP has never had the kind of money that would facilitate the raffle of a brand new car.

Just some more connections between Barrio Planners and Molina's office. Alma Martinez old college roomate works for Barrio Planners and is married to Frank Villalobos brother; Gloria's Health Deputy, Martha Molina - no relation, has a sister working for Barrio Planners; and Gloria's husband has long been on Barrio lanners payroll - even if it is off the books - with the kind of money he's made, it shouldn't be hard to track down. BTW, Ron Martinez was Toy's best man at his wedding. It's all in the family, typical East L.A. politics.

December 27, 2006 9:43 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Is Gloria going to endorse Huizar or Alvin?

December 27, 2006 10:46 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

cd 14th accept the fact that Mr. Huizar will crush Alvin.

December 27, 2006 10:56 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

10:56 Wait till January. you be singing the blues.

December 27, 2006 11:34 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Too bad Joseph's holiday greetings got the CD14 crew posting.

We all know Huizar will win especially with all the idiot politicans that came out for him the last time because Antonio told them to. However, Alvin knows where all the bodies are buried and I mean he has a lot of dirt on Jose. Alvin knows he's not going to win but that isn't stopping him from having meetings throughout the district telling everyone what Jose's been up to. Jose lost 8 staffers in one year. That's a high turn over. They are also talking.

December 28, 2006 6:14 AM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Anyone know anything about the LAPD investigation (at Huisar's request) into allegations that Huisar had his staffers circulate his petitions on City time? This is grounds for disqualification. I hear there are witnesses that have already been interviewed by LAPD confirming the same?

December 28, 2006 12:24 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

Anon to clarify IT ISN'T LAPD THAT INVESTIGATES COUNCIL PEOPLE ON PETITION SIGNATURES. Its the ethics commission and I have a feeling its dumbass Matt Dowd who posted that last blog. LAPD DID NOT INTERVIEW ANYONE because that's not what they do. Ask Garcetti daddy if they have done anything. The complaint was filed with ethics commission.

December 28, 2006 12:32 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

I heard it left the ethics commission (at Huisar's request) and went to LAPD for investigation of election fraud. And Huisar will most likely be disqualified.

December 28, 2006 12:57 PM  

Anonymous Anonymous said:

HEELLLOOOOOO LAPD DOES NOT DO ELECTION FRAUD NO MATTER HUIZAR HAS SAID CAUSE HE'S LYING.....THAT'S THE ETHICS COMMISSION. CALL GARCETTI OR BOYASKY AND ASK THEM.

TWO PEOPLE WHO ARE RUNNING AGAINST JOSE FILED A COMPLAINT WITH ETHICS CAUSE THEY SAID JOSE HAD ILLEGALS GETTING SIGNATURES WHICH IS NOT LEGAL.

December 28, 2006 1:53 PM  

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