Solar System Votes Pluto Off The Island - LAUSD Impact

Astronomers have decided Pluto is no longer a planet.

Pluto's moons, Charon, Nix and Hydra, issued a statement expressing disappointment and humiliation at the decision.

Science textbook publishers, however, are elated at the news. "There are billions and billions of stars," said Skip Penderbrook, a texbook salesman, "and millions and millions of textbooks that must now be replaced."

In a related story, several textbook publishers are lobbying to have Alaska's name changed to "Maitsiak," the Inuit word for "beautiful."